What Hurts The Most
by NALEYAAF23
Summary: Derek and Meredith were once in love and happily married. Then everything changed. They divorced and went their separate ways. Now three years later, they meet up at SGH. Will they be able to work through their differences to save patients and their love?
1. Prologue

**A/N**: Here's the start of my new Meredith/McDreamy story. Please read and review.

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Prologue

_New York_

Meredith Grey looked at the clock for the thousandth time. It was really late, almost midnight. She'd have thought her husband would have been back from work by now. They both worked in the same hospital, but worked different shifts.

Of course, he hasn't been coming home on time lately anyway. It wasn't because of the late shifts that he had of his job. Instead, it was because he would spend his nights at one of the bars getting drunk. He wouldn't care when he got home. Sometimes, he didn't even get home. Instead, he would go and crash at Mark's house. Mark or Addison would always call her when he did. Meredith was grateful because she knew that Derek wouldn't.

Meredith was used to this by now. Derek has been doing this for weeks. She was tired of it. Their marriage was already on the rocks. Derek's drinking was just making it worse. She didn't care if drinking comforted him. He knew what could happen if he wasn't careful.

Meredith wished that it could be like the old days. She and Derek had met early in medical school. It was love at first sight. It wasn't long before they were married. They were happy for awhile. Then that one event changed everything and now, the two were miserable.

She then heard the front door open. She went into the front hall where Derek was taking off his coat. "Derek, where the hell have you been?" she demanded.

"Where do you think?" he snapped.

Meredith then knew the answer. She gave him a look. "Do you really hate my company that badly that you have to go to the bar every night?"

"I'd really don't want to have this conversation now. We'll talk in the morning," Derek said as he pushed past her.

He started to walk up the stairs when Meredith stopped him. "No, we'll talk now. Derek, you can't keep doing this."

"Why not?" Derek snapped.

Meredith was tired of this argument. They seemed to have it practically every night. She decided to try and reason with him. "Derek, don't you think I'm hurting too? But I don't go and drown myself in alcohol every night!"

"Well, it's not any better than drowning yourself in schoolwork!" Derek exclaimed. "Or being the third wheel to Mark and Addison!"

Meredith couldn't believe that he was accusing her when he had no right to. "How the hell would you know what I do? You're never here," she shouted. "And you should be here! After all, you're my husband!"

"The world doesn't revolve around you," Derek replied. His anger was getting the best of him. "I don't have to come home and coddle you if I don't want to."

Meredith gave him a look. "You know that's not what I meant."

"Drinking soothes me. As I recall, we both used to do it," he reminded her.

Meredith knew that he had a point. "I don't anymore," she said softly. "And you shouldn't either."

Derek gave her an angry look. "You can't tell me what to do," he told her.

Meredith groaned frustrated. "You know what? I'm sick and tired of you taking everything I say and turn it into something bad!"

"I'm sick and tired of you bitching about my drinking!" Derek exclaimed angrily.

"Well, you deserve it!" Meredith replied. She let out a defeated sigh. "You know what? If you want to act like this, then that's fine. But I can't do this anymore. I won't. I want you out of my house."

Derek raised his eyebrows. "Your house? It is _our_ house. I live here too, you know!"

Meredith gave him a look. "Really? Because you haven't been in this house except to fall asleep after you come back from the bar," she replied. "And you're right. I can't tell you what to do. If you won't move out, I will." She had a feeling that Derek wouldn't instantly go and pack.

Before Derek could reply, Meredith pushed past him and walked up the stairs. She went to their bedroom and pulled out her suitcase from the closet. She put it on the bed before she started to pull out the dresser drawers and stuffed her clothes into her suitcase. She could hear Derek's voice behind her. "You know what? I'm glad you're moving out. I won't have to deal with a bossy know-it-all who likes to control my every move."

Meredith didn't care if that was the alcohol talking or not. She wasn't going to take it anymore. She finished packing before closing the suitcase. "I'll be back for the rest later."

"Whatever," Derek replied before he left the room.

A little while later, Meredith was standing on the front porch of Mark's and Addison's house. She knocked on the door and waited patiently until someone answered. Finally, the door opened and Mark was there. He didn't seem surprised as he let Meredith in.

"What did Derek do this time?" Mark asked as he crossed his arms.

Meredith sighed. "It was the usual. And we had a huge fight. And I told him I was done. I can't take this anymore," she explained as Addison came in the front hall.

"Mere, are you sure?" Addison asked her.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah, I am. As soon as the divorce is final and I'm done with school, I'm out of here."

Addison looked at her. "What are you talking about?" she asked. "Surely, you are going to stay in New York."

Meredith shook her head. "No, I can't. There are too many memories here, good and bad. I want to get as far away as I can from here."

"Where are you planning to go?" Mark asked.

Meredith didn't even have to think before she answered his question. It was the place where she had grown up and really had wanted to go back to since she moved to New York. "I'm going back to Seattle."


	2. Chapter One

**A/N**: Wow, thank you for all the alerts/favorites and of course, the reviews!

**Disclaimer**: Don't own Grey's Anatomy

* * *

**Chapter One**

_Seattle_

_Three Years Later…_

As Meredith came down the stairs, she could smell someone making breakfast. She knew it was Lexie, her younger sister and roommate. She went into the kitchen and saw Lexie cooking over the stove. "Morning, that smells delicious," Meredith said as she poured herself some coffee.

"Morning," Lexie replied. "Is there any way to get on Christina's good side?"

"She has no good side," Meredith told her with a smile. She then sipped her coffee. "You should know that by now."

"Come on. You're her person. Can't you tell her to lighten up or something?" Lexie moaned.

"I can't help it if you're her intern and not mine. You're just going to have to suck it up. It's only for a few more months," Meredith replied. "Then you won't have to worry about her anymore." She was then handed a plate full of bacon and eggs. "Thank you." She went to the table and started eating her breakfast.

Meredith and Lexie were close, practically best friends. They had been ever since their father Thatcher Grey walked out of their family when they were young. Their mother Ellis Grey was hard on both of them. Meredith and Lexie were able to stick together to get through the rough times. Ellis died while Meredith and Derek were going through the divorce. Meredith and Lexie knew that they couldn't bear to have the house sold since the house had been in the family. So they decided to move in together as roommates.

"I've been thinking. Maybe, we should have some more roommates to fill those rooms upstairs. After all, it is just the two of us," Lexie said as she grabbed her own plate of food and sat down next to Meredith.

"Well, it was just the three of us when Mom was alive," Meredith pointed out. "But I agree. It's a little too quiet at times." She then heard her pager. "How about we talk about it after work?" She quickly ate the rest of her breakfast and hurried to the front hall.

"Ok, we'll meet at Joe's," Lexie replied as she followed her sister.

Meredith nodded as she grabbed her purse from the table by the door. "Yeah, that's fine. See you at work, Lex." She then pulled her coat out of the coat closet.

"Bye Meredith," Lexie replied before Meredith went out the front door.

* * *

Meredith barely arrived when patients started being wheeled in from the ambulance bay. She didn't have a chance to talk to her friends until after things calmed down. "Did you check out the new resident?" Izzie asked as she, Meredith and Christina walked down the hall. "He's such a hottie."

"Really?" Meredith asked.

"He was helping us earlier with patients. He's really nice," Izzie told her.

"Are you talking about the new resident?" Alex asked them as he caught up to them. "He's too good to be a resident. He showed off too much."

"You're just jealous," Izzie accused him.

Alex looked at her. "Me, jealous? Yeah, right."

"Now, I'm curious about this resident," Meredith said.

"He's talking to Dr. Webber right now in his office. Maybe you can get a glimpse of him on the bridge," Izzie told her. Meredith smiled before they hurried off to the bridge. They looked through the glass window of the Chief's office.

Meredith squinted to get a good look at the figure talking to Dr. Webber. "I must be hallucinating because that looks like my ex-husband," she mumbled to herself. She laughed it off. However, she watched as Dr. Webber and the gentleman walked out of the office. She then hurried over to get a closer look. She gasped as she saw Derek. He turned to her. He looked surprised as she did. "Derek, what are you doing here?" she demanded. She then answered her own question. "You're the new resident."

"Do you two know each other?" Dr. Webber asked, noticing the tension between the two.

"Yes, unfortunately. He's my ex-husband," Meredith replied.

Dr. Webber then turned red. "I see. Well, I'll let you two get reacquainted," he said before he went back into his office.

Meredith just stared at Derek. "Derek, what are you doing here?" she repeated. "Surely, you're not really here to work on your residency."

"Well, I'm certainly not here for a visit," Derek replied. He then heard his pager go off. "Now if you would excuse me, I have to go check up on a patient," he told her before he rushed off.

Meredith groaned frustrated. "What was that all about?" Izzie asked her as she, Christina and Alex came over. They didn't think that they should walk over while Derek and Meredith were fighting.

"I know the new resident. He's my ex-husband Derek Shepherd," Meredith told them.

Her friends were shocked. "That was McDreamy?" Christina exclaimed, using the name that Meredith used to call Derek back in medical school.

"Yeah, I really don't want to talk about it," Meredith replied as she started walking in the opposite direction Derek did.

"You're going to have to talk about it sometime. After all, he's going to be working here," Alex pointed out. Meredith just ignored him.

* * *

Hours later, Meredith's shift finally ended. As she went into the locker room, she saw that Derek was already there. They quietly exchanged hellos as Meredith went to her locker. They didn't say anything as the other residents came in.

After she was ready, she took off for the bar. However, Derek was right behind her. He easily caught up to her. Meredith just scoffed at him. "You're going to Joe's too, huh? I'm surprised," he said as they came closer to the bar.

Meredith gave him a look. "Just because I'm going into the bar doesn't mean I'm going to drink. There are other things to do in there, you know, without the drinking part. You should try it sometime." She then walked into the bar and went to the counter. She grabbed a stool. Derek then ordered his drink before he went to sit down at a table.

Meredith's friends started wandering in including Lexie. She grabbed a seat next to Meredith as she saw Derek sitting in the corner. "So it's true?" she asked as Derek noticed her. He came over and the two exchanged hellos.

Derek gave his former sister-in-law a smile. "I haven't seen you in forever. How are you?" he asked her.

Lexie gave him a smile in return. "I'm great," she replied. "How are you?"

"I'm doing well. I suppose you heard that I'm going to be finishing my residency at Seattle Grace Hospital," Derek said. Meredith noticed that he was completely ignoring her. She wasn't surprised, considering that they weren't on good terms.

Lexie nodded. "Yeah, it's great, isn't it?" Meredith just rolled her eyes.

Derek saw it, but continued to ignore her. He knew how awkward it was to talk to Lexie while Meredith was there. "You know what? I'm going to go, but we'll talk later." He knew leaving would be the best decision.

Lexie had to agree. "Ok, Bye Derek," Lexie replied before Derek went through the crowd and towards the exit. She then turned back to her sister. "Well, he hasn't changed a bit," she said before she turned to Joe.

Meredith knew that Lexie meant it as a good thing. Meredith, however, could only see the Derek she had saw that night she had left him. "No, he hasn't," she muttered to herself. "Not one bit."


	3. Chapter Two

**A/N**: Again, thank you for all the favorites/story alerts and the reviews!

**Disclaimer**: Don't own Grey's Anatomy

* * *

**Chapter Two**

Meredith arrived home from another long shift, exhausted. The first few hours were quiet. It was mostly rounds until a car accident came in. Taking care of those kids brought painful memories for both Meredith _and_ Derek. However, she was able to hold together long enough to take care of her young patient. Luckily, the whole family made it through. Hearing that wonderful news comforted Meredith with her own pain.

Meredith was also exhausted because of Derek. She had spent the last few days avoiding him when she could. Other times, she couldn't and they would argue in low whispers about anything but their patient. She still hadn't been able to get a clear answer on why Derek was in Seattle. She didn't believe his excuse that he came here to finish his residency. He knew that Seattle was her hometown. He knew that she had moved back after the divorce was final.

She immediately went upstairs and started to get ready for bed. She was ready to get some sleep before her next shift. After brushing her teeth, she changed her clothes into her pajamas. She then crawled into bed and cuddled under the covers. However, her thoughts started to drift off to better times with Derek.

_Meredith was studying when she heard someone come in the front door. She knew that it was Derek. He came in the room and walked over to her. She smiled as he gave her a kiss on the cheek. "How's my beautiful wife?" he asked her._

_Meredith groaned. "I'd rather do anything than study right now."_

_"Well, why don't you take a break then?" Derek asked her. Meredith sighed. He kept trying to encourage her to go. "Mark and Addison invited us to go with them to the club tonight." She was about to protest when he continued. "Come on. We all have been studying hard lately. You need to come and have some fun. Plus you get to spend more time with your new husband."_

_Meredith knew he had a point there. They all had been studying hard and needed some time away from the books. Partying at the club might be a good idea. Besides, she could spend some more time with Derek. "Alright, I'll go, but only for a few hours."_

_Derek looked at her. "You're certainly a party girl, aren't you?" he teased. _

_"That's why you married me? Because I don't like to party?" Meredith joked._

_Derek laughed. "You're so cute sometimes."_

_Meredith smiled. "So are you." They then shared a loving kiss that soon turned into a passionate kiss. "We don't have to go right now, do we?" she asked she pulled away._

_"No," Derek said as he continued kissing her. "What are you thinking about?"_

_Meredith thought for a few seconds. "How about we go into the bedroom for some private time before we leave?" she asked him. "I'm sure Addison and Mark won't mind if we're a little late."_

_"Sounds like the perfect plan," Derek replied, giving her a smile before they headed to their bedroom._

Meredith opened her eyes. She sighed, wishing that it could be like that again. She then realized what she was doing. She had to stop thinking about Derek. She wasn't with him anymore. They were divorced and can move on with their lives.

She turned over on the other side and snuggled up to the covers again. She closed her eyes and triedto think of something other than Derek. She suddenly thought of the car accident. She immediately pushed that out of her mind. The painful memories were hard enough without it being there a second time. She knew if she did, she would start crying.

She finally gave up and went back downstairs to the kitchen. She started to make a pot of coffee when she heard the front door open. She knew it was Lexie since she stayed behind with their friends and went to Joe's. Sure enough, it was her younger sister coming through the door. Lexie was surprised when she saw her sister there. "Meredith, I thought you would be asleep by now."

"I couldn't, not after that car accident came in," Meredith replied softly as she poured herself a cup of coffee.

Lexie nodded understandingly. "I heard about that." Lexie was working on a different patient. So she wasn't there when the car accident came in. "I'm glad the family made it."

Meredith sighed. "I thought it would get easier as time goes by. But it's still hard every time victims of a car accident come in, especially children."

"Are you ok?" Lexie asked, noticing the upset look on her sister's face. "I can stay up with you if you want company."

Meredith smiled gratefully. "No, but thank you. I think I need some alone time."

"Ok, I'll be upstairs if you need me," Lexie told her.

Meredith sipped her coffee as she thought of that family who was in the car accident. She just couldn't get it out of her mind. When the family came in, everyone was separated. Meredith was in charge of the youngest, who was only the only one who really escaped injuries.

Little Isabella was three. Even though she wanted her parents, she trusted Meredith to take care of her until she was able to see them. Meredith was surprised since some three-year-olds protest and scream for their mother. Over the few hours she took care of Isabella, she grew attached to her and vice versa. But the little reunion made Meredith smile because she knew that Isabella would be going home with her family.

Meredith drank the rest of her coffee before she went to the family room and started watching television. She flipped through channels before she finally settled on a channel. She started watching the show and soon forgot about her troubles.

* * *

Meredith was with the other residents walking down the hall when Derek pulled her aside. "I just want to make sure you're alright," he said concerned.

Meredith knew he was referring to the car accident the other day. She had been upset, but didn't let Derek know that now. "Why wouldn't I be?" she asked him as she started to leave. "And I'm surprised you're asking, considering you never cared before," she snapped.

"That's not fair. We were both grieving then," Derek protested.

"The last time I looked, drinking and grieving was two different vocabulary terms," Meredith said angrily.

Derek gave her a look. "Do you really want to get into this argument again?" Derek asked.

Meredith was more than happy to change the subject. "Ok, you want to talk? How about you tell me the real reason you came here?" she demanded.

"I told you. I want to finish my residency here," Derek replied.

Meredith gave him a look. "That's crap and you know it." Derek was about to protest when she continued. "There are plenty of other cities, Derek. Why in the hell did you choose mine?" she exclaimed. Derek was about to answer when his pager went off. He left without giving Meredith an answer. She just watched him go in disbelief.


	4. Chapter Three

**A/N**: Thank you for all the reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Don't own Grey's Anatomy

* * *

**Chapter Three**

Meredith just glared at Derek as he sat across the cafeteria with Alex and George. He had tried to sit at their table, but she wouldn't let him. George did the nice thing and offered to sit with Derek somewhere else. Meredith was glad when they found a table across the room. However, she still couldn't stop shooting daggers at him.

"Stop staring at McDreamy," Christina said, nearly shouting.

Meredith turned to her. "He's not McDreamy anymore," she protested.

"He is too. Look at him. He's _so_ hot," Izzie exclaimed as she glanced over at him. "How did you ever let that guy go?"

"I can't believe this," Meredith muttered to herself before she left the table. She threw her tray away in the trash can and left the cafeteria. She then heard someone calling her name. She recognized the voice and groaned. Derek was the last person she wanted to talk to right now.

Derek easily managed to catch up with her. "Hey, I heard you and Lexie were looking for a few roommates. And I might be interested."

Meredith laughed. "You're joking."

Derek looked at her. "No, I'm serious, Meredith. You want a roommate and I need a place to stay that's bigger than a trailer."

Meredith raised her eyebrows. "A trailer?" She couldn't believe it.

Derek laughed. "Yeah, I don't like it either." He then corrected himself. "Well, I like it to a point. It's a little too cramped for me."

"Do you remember what happened the last time we stayed in a house together?" Meredith asked. Derek knew she had a point there. "Yeah, I don't think so." She then started to walk away from him when Derek stopped her.

"Look, that was three years ago. I've changed. Just give me a chance to prove it to you," Derek said.

Meredith looked into his eyes and knew he was being truthful. "I'll think about it," she replied before she left him.

* * *

"McDreamy wants to be your roommate?" Christina asked Meredith surprised after she told her about Derek at the beginning of their next shift. "Are you sure you two are divorced?" she asked.

Meredith gave her a look. "Yes, we are. Trust me."

Christina noticed her tone. "Sorry, but it does seem a little bit creepy that he's not only here in Seattle, but he's working at the exact same hospital you are and now wants to move in your house." Meredith didn't have a chance to reply as Christina continued. "And you said yourself that his excuse about his residency was crap."

"So you think Derek is stalking me?" Meredith asked her. "That is ridiculous. Why would he do that?"

"He's not stalking you," Alex said, speaking up as he joined them. "He probably moved here because of his new girlfriend."

"Now that's crap," Christina exclaimed.

"He has a new girlfriend?" Meredith asked Alex curious.

Alex shrugged. "Well, that's one of the rumors going around," he replied. "Of course, now I'm not sure since he wants to live with you," he told Meredith.

Meredith didn't have a chance to answer as Lexie came up to them. She showed Christina a patient's labs. Christina then gave her more instructions before Lexie dashed off. "I'll be so glad when I don't have to deal with her anymore." Meredith just shook her head in amusement. She didn't dare tell her that Lexie felt the same way about her. "Hey, are you going to go up to the gallery and watch McDreamy perform his surgery?"

Meredith gave her a look like she was crazy for asking. However, she did respond. "No, I think I'm going to skip this one. Besides, I know how he works. I've seen it myself," she reminded Christina.

"Come on. It will be fun," Alex said, encouraging her.

"Alex, leave her alone," said another voice. It was George, who was behind them. "She doesn't have to if she doesn't want to." He then pulled her away from the two.

"Thanks George," Meredith said gratefully. She didn't really want anybody to push her into seeing Derek, especially since they're divorced.

George gave her a smile. "Anytime."

* * *

Later, Meredith met up with Lexie as they changed their clothes after their shift was over. "I suppose Derek told you about moving in," Lexie guessed.

"I suppose it was your idea?" Meredith guessed back. She didn't even let her sister answer. "Look, I understand you two are still friends and all. And I respect that. But if you are trying to get me and Derek back together, your plan won't work."

Lexie was confused. "Mere, what are you talking about?"

Meredith turned to her. "So you weren't the one who suggested that Derek could move in with us?"

Lexie shook her head. "No, he came to me with the idea. I then told him that it was fine, but he would have to get the idea past you." Meredith was surprised. She didn't know how to respond as Lexie continued. "Listen, I know you two don't get along, but he's still family to me. And I don't turn my back on my family."

"Like he does?" Meredith snapped.

Lexie gave her a look. She was tired of her sister talking bad about past Derek. "Ok, you really need to let go of the past. How do you know that he hasn't changed since then? Have you tried to talk to him instead of fighting with him?"

"Lexie, this isn't any of your business," Meredith said angrily. "So butt out." She then angrily left the locker room. She then accidently bumped into Derek. He was about to apologize when Meredith just scoffed at him. "Forget it, Derek. There's no way in hell you are moving into my house."

Derek looked at her. "Is this about the rumors flying around about me?" Meredith just gave him a look as he continued. "Or it's because you're too stuck in the past that you aren't willing to give me another chance?"

"So it was Lexie's idea," Meredith exclaimed.

Derek firmly shook his head. "No, I really want us to try to start over as friends since we didn't leave on good terms." There was a slight pause before he continued. "Look, I will follow your house rules. If you feel like you want to or need to kick me out, I promise I will go without a fight."

Meredith looked at him. "Do I have your word on that?" Derek nodded. She thought for a moment before she spoke. "Then I guess I have another roommate." She suddenly had a weird feeling that she was going to regret her words.


	5. Chapter Four

**A/N**: Thank you for the reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Don't own Grey's Anatomy

* * *

**Chapter Four**

Meredith watched as Derek came in, holding a box. He set it down on the stairs. "Well, that's the last box. Thank you for doing this for me. I know this will be hard for us. But we'll make it work," Derek said.

"I didn't do this for you. I did it for Lexie," Meredith replied.

Derek just smiled. "You mean the sister who you fought with minutes before you told me that you were accepting my offer to be your roommate?"

Meredith was not amused. She gave him a look. "Do you have to stick your nose in my business all the time? Or can I have a private moment with my sister?" She didn't let Derek answer. "You do know I can kick you out right now?"

Derek continued to smile, but remained quiet as he went to the kitchen. Meredith just shook her head as she heard her cell phone ringing. She pulled the phone out from her purse and checked the caller ID. It was Addison. Meredith went upstairs to her room for some privacy. She didn't want to risk Derek hearing that conversation. "Hey, Addison."

_"Meredith, I know you're probably mad at me for not telling you. But I didn't know Derek was moving there myself until Mark told me after he already was in Seattle. How are you doing?"_

Meredith gave another sigh before answering. "He's driving me crazy. It will be probably worse now that he's my new roommate."

There was a few seconds of silence on the other end as if Addison was making sure she had heard correctly. _"Wait a minute, what do you mean he's your new roommate?"_

"He's living here with me and Lexie," Meredith told her.

_"I don't understand. If he's driving you crazy, why is he your new roommate?"_

"Honestly, I don't know. I guess I'm trying to be nice to him since he has nowhere else to go except a trailer."

_"Do you think you'll be able to handle living with him again?"_

"Well, he said that I could kick him out anytime I want. So we'll have to see," Meredith said. "How are you doing?"

There was another few seconds of silence. _"Well, you're the first to know besides Mark that I'm pregnant. I recognized the signs and realized that I'm four weeks along."_

Meredith was surprised, but pleased. "That's fantastic. I'm really happy for you two."

_"You should have seen Mark when I told him. He practically fainted on the floor."_

Meredith smiled at the thought. She could just imagine Mark doing that. "I'm sure he did."

There was then a loud beeping on the other end. Meredith assumed that Addison just got paged. _"Mere, I got to go. I'll talk to you later. Be patient with Derek."_

Meredith somehow knew that Addison was going to say something like that. She knew her friend too well. "I will. And congratulations to you and Mark," Meredith replied.

_"Thanks. Bye, Mere," _Addison said before she hung up.

Meredith then closed her phone. She then jumped as she heard a knock at her door. "Hey, I just was going to get some stuff from the store for me. Do you need anything?" Derek asked her.

Meredith didn't say anything at first. "Addison's pregnant," she suddenly blurted out.

Derek nodded. "Yeah, I know. Mark told me earlier. I'm happy for them." There was an awkward silence. "Did you need anything from the store?"

Meredith shook her head before he left the room. She then turned to the picture on her side table. She went over and picked it up. She smiled to herself as she looked at it. "What do you have there?" asked a voice. Apparently, Derek had been watching her. She turned around and showed the picture to him. Derek smiled as he saw which picture it was. "That's a great picture."

"It's one of my favorite pictures." There was then a pause. "After all, that's all I have left of Kylie."

Derek looked at her. "That's not true. We have the memories we had together with her."

Meredith didn't answer him as tears began to form in her eyes. "I know, but it still hurts. Every little thing reminds me of her."

Derek nodded. He had to agree. "I know what you mean. Every time I go past the toy store, I think of Kylie."

Meredith didn't reply. Instead, she went onto another question. "Why did it have to be her, Derek?" she whispered. "She was just a little girl."

Derek shook his head. "I wish I knew." He then left once again as Meredith went back to the picture.

_Meredith walked down the hall to her daughter's bedroom. She watched as Kylie played with her Barbie dolls. She wished she didn't have to interrupt, but it was getting late. "Ok honey, it's time for bed. You have a big day tomorrow."_

"_I get to go to school like you and Daddy do, right?" Kylie asked her excitedly. She set down her dolls as she got up from the floor. Her long blonde hair went flying as she ran to her bed. _

_Meredith gave her daughter a wide smile. "That's right."_

"_Will I get homework?"Kylie asked as she pushed back the covers. She then got in and pulled the covers back towards her._

_Meredith laughed as she helped Kylie snuggle in her bed with Teddy, her favorite stuffed animal. However, she shook her head. "No, you're only in preschool. So you won't have to worry about homework until you're in first grade."_

"_Will it be hard like yours?" she asked._

_Meredith smiled as Kylie continued the questions. She knew her daughter was just curious. "I suppose it will be hard for you at first. But you'll get the hang of it."_

"_Hey, I thought you were telling her a bedtime story," said a voice in the doorway. _

_Meredith turned to Derek. "She wants to know about school instead."_

_Derek smiled as he walked over to them. "I see. What have you learned so far, Kylie?"_

"_I don't get homework until first grade," Kylie replied proudly._

_Derek nodded. "That's right. And when you get into first grade, you'll be the smartest kid in there."_

"_Because I inherited your brain," Kylie replied._

_Her parents laughed. She always knew what to say. Derek then kissed her. "Good night, Kylie."_

"_Night, Daddy," Kylie replied before her mother gave her a kiss. "Night, Mommy."_

"_I love you," Meredith said._

"_I love you too," Kylie replied as her parents left her room._

Meredith snapped out of her daydream and looked at the picture one last time. It was Kylie smiling proudly on her first day of preschool. "I miss you, baby." She then put the photo back into its place on the nightstand and left her bedroom.


	6. Chapter Five

**A/N**: Thank you for the positive reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Only own the late Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Five**

"So how is it living with Derek again?" Izzie asked Meredith curiously as she, Meredith and Christina walked down the hall. It had been a few days since Derek moved in.

Meredith sighed. "It's hard. Living with him has brought back memories for the both of us. And there are a few issues, but we're working them out."

"You mean like keeping the toilet seat down?" Izzie asked her. She didn't let Meredith answer. Instead, she went on. "I hate that. Alex does that all the time. It drives me crazy." She turned to Christina. "You're so lucky that you don't have a roommate."

"That's because I would suck as a roommate. Why do you think I didn't volunteer?" Christina asked.

Meredith then noticed someone she thought she recognized in the waiting room. She excused herself and started walking towards the waiting room. As she got closer, she saw that it was the person she thought it was. "Kathleen?" she asked, unable to believe that one of Derek's sisters was here.

Kathleen smiled when she saw her former sister-in-law. She walked over to Meredith and they met up in the hallway. "Hey Meredith," she said as they shared a hug.

Meredith still didn't understand. "What are you doing here?" she asked her.

"Well, I heard my brother sneaked off here. I wanted to see if it was true," Kathleen replied.

Meredith nodded. "He's here alright."

Kathleen shook her head disapprovingly. "I'm going to have a talk with him later. He had no reason to come here and bother you."

Meredith couldn't help but smile. Kathleen was one of the members of the Shepherd family who was on Meredith's side when she left Derek. "You really don't have to do that. We fight sometimes. But we work it out."

"You don't have to defend him. He doesn't deserve it after all the trouble he put you through," Kathleen replied. "I know he's my brother and all. But he needs to get his ass kicked once in awhile."

Meredith couldn't help but smile. "I suppose you haven't heard that Derek's living with me and Lexie now."

Kathleen looked at her, shocked. Meredith then knew her answer. "I think I've just entered the Twilight zone."

Meredith couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah, it may be a little bit crazy for me to let him in my house, but I'm trying to be nice to him."

Kathleen raised her eyebrows. It was obvious that she didn't believe her. "You don't need to feel sorry for him, Meredith. Trust me."

Meredith shook her head. "I wasn't feeling sorry for him. I'm trying to get back to being friends with him again."

"According to Derek, you both kind of skipped that part the first time," Kathleen replied.

Meredith knew that was true. However, she didn't have a chance to answer as she heard footsteps behind her. She turned around to see a surprised Derek. "Kathleen, what are you doing here?" he asked.

Kathleen was amused at her brother's reaction. "Hello to you too, Derek," she replied. "What do you think I'm doing here? I'm here to visit poor Meredith and apparently my big brother."

"Mark needs to keep his mouth shut," Derek said, knowing right away who told on him.

"I've invited Kathleen to stay with us," Meredith told Derek, giving him a wide smile. She knew that he would be mad.

Derek put on a fake smile on. She could tell that she had accomplished her goal in annoying him. "May I speak to Meredith for just a moment?" He didn't let his sister answer as he pulled Meredith away from Kathleen. "You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"She's your sister. How could I say no?" Meredith asked him.

Derek just glared at her. "This means war."

"Bring it on," Meredith replied.

* * *

That night, the four sat around the dining room table as they ate dinner. Derek, Meredith and Lexie all managed to get off around the same time. So Lexie offered to fix dinner. "This is a lovely house, Meredith," Kathleen said to Meredith. "Did you say that this is your mother's house?"

Meredith nodded. "Thank you. Yes, and we're the third generation living here."

"It sounds like you still can't let go of the past," Derek snapped.

Meredith glared at him. She could tell that he had done that on purpose to get back at her for earlier. "Well, at least I'm not hiding the real reason I've moved back, unlike you."

"We're back to this again," Derek exclaimed angrily.

"That's because I don't believe your excuse," Meredith shouted. "And you keep dodging the question every time I bring it up."

Kathleen suddenly stopped them before they went too far. "Ok, this is just like old times," she said with a forced laugh. "How about we change the subject?"

"Good idea," Lexie added. Apparently, she didn't want to hear them fight either.

"Actually, I don't feel like talking anymore," Derek said angrily as he got up from his chair. He left the dining room. Everyone was quiet as they heard the front door slam. Kathleen excused herself and left the room to talk to Derek.

"This is exactly why I didn't want Derek to move in," Meredith hissed to Lexie as soon as Kathleen was gone.

Lexie gave her a look. "I'm not the one who told him he could move in," she said before she left her sister alone in the room.

Meredith knew she had a point. She also knew what she had to do. She waited until Kathleen and Derek were done talking before she went outside. Neither of them said anything for a few moments. Then Derek suddenly spoke. "Kathleen told me that you want to try to be friends. You certainly have a funny way in showing it," he snapped.

Meredith sighed. "Ok, you have a point. And I'm sorry. It's just not easy for me to have you living with me again. After all, we didn't part on good terms."

Derek knew she was right. "I guess I'm not making it any easier on you than you are on me."

Meredith managed a smile. "No, I guess not." There was a pause. "I think we should call a truce for now. Otherwise, this will never work out."

Derek nodded. "And that means no more ragging on me about the reason I came here. I will to tell you when I'm ready."

Meredith sighed, but agreed. "Deal. Now should we join Kathleen and Lexie in the living room?"

Derek nodded. "Yeah, they're probably telling stories about us how we were so bossy to them or something."

"I was not bossy," Meredith exclaimed.

Derek smiled. "That's not what Lexie told me," he joked. Meredith smiled back as she gently hit him.

* * *

"Well, this has been fun, but I think I've embarrassed Derek long enough. So I'm going to bed," Kathleen said as she got up from the couch. She, Lexie and Meredith were on the couch while Derek was in the lounge chair. "Good night all."

"Night, see you in the morning," Derek said as his sister left the room.

Lexie sighed. "I should probably go to bed too. I have an early shift tomorrow," she replied before she got up from her spot on the couch. "Good night."

"Night, Lex," Meredith replied.

"Night," Derek added. Lexie soon left the room, leaving her sister and her ex-husband. "I noticed that my dear sister didn't mention about how long she was staying."

"I'm sure it's just for a few days," Meredith replied, trying not to smile.

Derek chuckled. "Yeah, you're probably right. It's usually Amy who shows up unannounced and stays days on end." He knew that it drove Meredith crazy when his youngest sister stayed with them. She always seemed to cause trouble.

Meredith groaned. "Don't even go there. Do you remember the last time she showed up unannounced at our doorstep?" Meredith asked him. "We went out that afternoon for something and left Kylie in her care. They went to Central Park and she lost her in the crowd."

Derek nodded, remembering that incident. "It took her awhile, but she finally found Kylie at the carousal. We never let Kylie alone with Amy again."

"The carousal always was Kylie's favorite place in Central Park," Meredith replied softly. "That was the first place we always went to when we took her there."

"Well, she loved animals," Derek reminded her as their eyes met.

Meredith managed a smile. "Yeah, she did, didn't she?" She then broke the trance. "Well, I'm going to head up to bed."

Derek nodded as he managed to get out of the chair. "Yeah, I should probably head up to bed too." He followed her out of the room and up the stairs. They reached their rooms and parted ways there. "Good night," Derek said.

Meredith was halfway in her room before answering. "Good night, Derek," she replied before she shut the door. She changed into her pajamas. As she crawled into her bed, she smiled to herself. She was glad that they had finally called a truce and put their fighting aside for now. She was tired of fighting with him. She could tell that he was too. Now, they could start over and become friends. However, she'd soon realize that her feelings would tell her differently.


	7. Chapter Six

**A/N**: Thank you for all the positive reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Six**

Meredith came in the front door. She was still trying to catch her breath as she went through the house. "Hey, how was your jog with Christina?" Derek asked her as she entered the kitchen. She went over and opened the fridge. She grabbed a bottle of water before answering.

Meredith smiled. "Great. Did Kathleen get to her gate ok?" she asked as she opened the bottle and drank some of the cold water.

Derek nodded. "Yeah. The plane should be in the air now." He then changed the subject back to her. "So what do you and Christina talk about on your jogs?"

Meredith shrugged. "It's mostly girl talk. As a guy, you wouldn't understand it."

Derek laughed. "You were talking about me."

Meredith was amused. "Why would I talk about you? What's so interesting about you?" she asked playfully.

Derek was glad that she decided to play along. So he continued the game. "Come on. Your friends are dying to know about me. And you are the only one who can tell them. You must tell them about my good looks and my charm."

Meredith laughed. "They know all about your good looks. I don't need to tell them anything about that."

Derek smiled proudly. "What about my charm?"

Meredith looked at him. "What charm?" she joked. Derek laughed. She couldn't help but smile in return. Talking with Derek like this made her think of the old days. She wished it was like this all the time. "I miss this."

Derek looked at her as he nodded. "Me too," he admitted.

There was a few seconds of silence. Meredith finally spoke. "Things were never the same after the car accident," she said softly. "It was like the whole world was ending."

Derek knew how she felt. He had the same feeling when Kylie died. He wished he could put her into his arms and comfort her like he used to. That always helped her feel better about a hard situation like the car accident. He could tell that she needed some comforting right now. However, he knew that it would be awkward for the both of them. He was willing to do it as a friend. But before he could move, he could hear his pager go off. He quietly groaned to himself.

"Isn't that your pager?" Meredith asked him.

Derek sighed. "Yeah, I got to go. I'll see you at the hospital later."

Meredith nodded as she watched him leave. She was a little disappointed that he wasn't able to stay longer. She then remembered something that she wanted to ask him. She hurried after him. She was able to catch him at the front door. "Derek, wait." Derek turned to her. He was anxious to hear what she was going to say. "Before I forget, I wanted to ask you if you wanted to join me and my friends for a game of baseball in the park after our shifts are over." Meredith wanted to say more, but she knew that Derek had to leave.

Derek gave her a smile. "Sounds like fun."

Meredith smiled in return. "Great. See you then."

* * *

The hours ticked by slowly. It seemed like an eternity before their shifts were over. Finally, the third year residents along with Lexie headed over to the park. "I still can't believe you invited Derek to play with us," Izzie said as they made their way over to the field.

"I thought it would be nice if you guys could get to know Derek outside of work," Meredith replied.

"Boy, you are really into that truce thing, aren't you?" Christina asked her.

"Is that a bad thing?" Meredith said. "Or would you rather have us fight?"

Before either of them could answer, they arrived on the field. Lexie was right behind them. The guys were already there. After a few minutes, the gang finally decided who would be on which team. Derek and Meredith were on opposite teams for the first couple of games.

A couple of hours later, everyone was exhausted. So they decided to quit the game. Meredith and Lexie said good-bye to the others as they headed to their cars. Derek was right besides them. "This was fun. Do you guys play baseball a lot?" he asked Meredith.

Meredith nodded. "We do it whenever we can, with the weather permitting, of course."

"You know what? I got to go to find a bathroom. I'll be back in a few minutes," Lexie said as she hurried away from them into the park.

Meredith had a feeling that she did that on purpose. It was if she wanted her to talk to Derek. "Well, I will see you later," she said as she turned back to Derek.

"Actually, I was wondering if I could take you to dinner sometime and play catch up," Derek said.

Meredith was surprised. "As friends?" She knew that's what he meant. But she wanted to make sure.

Derek nodded. "Yeah, of course."

Meredith thought for a few moments before answering. "I'd love to."

* * *

"Why the hell did I say yes?" Meredith moaned as she walked down the hall with Christina. At first, she was fine with her answer. But now, she was having second thoughts. "After all, he's my ex-husband."

"Because you _want_ to," Christina replied like it was obvious.

"What's going on?" Izzie asked as she caught up with them.

"Meredith's going on a date with McDreamy," Christina told her. Meredith gave her a look. She should have known that Christina would say it that way.

Izzie turned to Meredith surprised. "Really?"

Meredith somehow knew that she would have to explain herself over and over again. "It's not a date. We're just going out to dinner as friends and talk," she replied. "After all, we have a truce going."

"Doesn't that only apply at the house?" Izzie asked.

"No, it applies everywhere. Derek and I really don't want to fight in front of patients," Meredith replied. "We both agreed. And we are going to stick to it."

"Whatever. It won't last long," Christina said.

Meredith gave her another annoyed look. Christina may be her best friend. But her negative attitude drove her crazy sometimes. "Thanks for your vote of confidence," she replied before she left them.

That night, Derek took Meredith to a nice restaurant. Meredith could see that they were both nervous. They had hardly said anything on the ride over. It had been forever since Derek took Meredith out to dinner, even after Kylie was born. After they ordered their drinks, there were a few moments of silence before Meredith finally started the conversation. "So I don't suppose you left a girlfriend behind or anything when you moved here?" she asked curiously.

Derek shook his head. "No, I broke up with my girlfriend before I moved here," he replied. "There's that whole long distance relationship thing. And those never really work out."

"How long were you dating her?" Meredith asked. She was suddenly curious to know about this past relationship that Derek had.

Derek shrugged. "It was only for a few months. So it wasn't a big deal when we broke up. She understood." Meredith looked at him hard. She could tell that he was lost in thought. She tried to read his face. But she couldn't tell what he was thinking. "What about you?"

Meredith gave a little laugh. "No, I haven't. My friends had tried to set me up on blind dates. But they never worked out."

Derek didn't say anything as their drinks arrived. After ordering their food, Derek and Meredith changed topics. They talked about different subjects as they ate their dinner. As time passed, they both became more relaxed with each other.

After they had dinner, they decided to skip dessert. Instead, Derek paid for the check and then led her outside. They started walking down the street and started talking about good memories. "Do you remember how shocked you were when I told you that I was pregnant?" Meredith asked him. "You didn't believe me because you thought I was too inexperienced about the whole pregnancy thing.

Derek nodded, smiling at the memory. "You had to take a pregnancy test to prove to me that you were."

"Well, it's not like I had expected to get pregnant so soon after we got married," Meredith replied. "After all, we were still in medical school."

"I'm just glad Mom was willing to help out. Otherwise, I don't think we would have made it past that semester," Derek added. "Of course, she would do anything for her only son and unborn grandchild."

Meredith knew he was right. "Speaking of your mother, does she know you're here?"

Derek gave her a knowing smile. "Kathleen will do the honors and tell the family that I've followed you here. In fact, I've already gotten an earful from Mom when she called me last night."

"And what did she say?" Meredith asked.

"She gave me a long lecture about the whole situation. But she's not going to come and try to convince me to come back to New York. You're stuck with me," Derek said.

Meredith gave him a smile. "Somehow, I think I'll survive." Derek couldn't help but smile back.


	8. Chapter Seven

**A/N**: Thank you for the positive reviews. And I promise that the actual details of the car accident will be revealed soon.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Seven**

Meredith couldn't believe she was talking to Dr. Wyatt. But Lexie thought that she should share her feelings about Derek and Kylie with somebody, since she wasn't getting them out anyway else. "Everybody says that I should move on from the past. But how can I when my ex-husband unexpectedly shows up here? Every time I see him, memories come back of our times together, especially with our daughter." There was a short pause. "She died in a car accident when she was four."

Dr. Wyatt suddenly sympathesized for her. "I'm so sorry." She looked at Meredith hard. "That must have been hard on you and your husband," she said.

Meredith nodded. "Thank you. And it was. Derek and I blamed each other. That always led to long arguments and eventually Derek was always the one who left. He would be gone for hours. Then when he would come back, we gave each other the silent treatment. We started avoiding each other no matter where we were: home, school and work. If we did try to talk, it would lead to another argument. Derek started drinking and it got to the point where I couldn't take it anymore."

"So you moved out?" Dr. Wyatt asked.

Meredith nodded. "I had no choice. I knew Derek wasn't going to stop drinking. And I was tired of fighting with him." She suddenly changed the subject. "He says he's here to finish his residency. But why would he come here all the way from New York here when he knew that I lived here?"

"Why do you think he did?" Dr. Wyatt asked.

Meredith was surprised by her question. However, she tried to think of an answer. Her mind was a blank. She held up her hands in defeat. "I don't know."

"I think you do know. And I think that's the reason you're holding onto the past. You just may not want to admit it," Dr. Wyatt replied. Meredith just gave her a look like she was crazy.

A few minutes later, Meredith finally was able to get out of the office. She walked into the hall. She was still confused by Dr. Wyatt's words. She was so focused on that that she didn't her name being called until Derek came up besides her. "I didn't know you were seeing a therapist," he said as they walked down the hall.

"I've just started going. Lexie wanted me to do it. She thinks it will help me let go of the past," Meredith replied.

Derek was surprised. "So did you talk about me in there?"

Meredith wasn't in the mood. "Sorry, it's patient-doctor confidentiality. I can't tell you. And even if I could tell you, I wouldn't."

Derek just laughed. "You talked about me in there, didn't you?" Meredith just gave him a look before she continued walking down the hall. She had a feeling that he would find this amusing. It was just the way he was. "That's fine with me if you talked about me in there. I'm used to you talking about me behind my back."

Meredith was about to comment on that when she remembered the truce. So she kept her mouth shut and continued towards the elevators. She then heard footsteps behind her and glanced over her shoulder. She could see that he was following her. She stopped and turned around to look at him. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going this way too," Derek replied as he walked past her. "And I'm trying to cheer you up."

"Well, it's not working," Meredith told him as she caught up with him. "And it's not your job to cheer me up anymore."

"It wasn't even my job in the first place. It was Kylie's," Derek replied as they reached the elevator. She looked at him, realizing he was right. Kylie was always the one who cheered her up when she wasn't in a good mood.

The elevator dinged and Derek and Meredith walked in. Derek pressed their floor right before the door closed. It was silence as the elevator started. But then, the two were knocked off their feet as the elevator suddenly jarred and stopped.

Derek helped Meredith up. "Don't tell me we're stuck in the elevator," she moaned as Derek started to press buttons.

"I'm afraid so," Derek replied as he put his hands up in defeat.

"Great," Meredith muttered.

Derek managed to get somebody on the line. After a few minutes, the person told them that they were going to get someone on it as soon as possible. "This might be awhile," Derek told her.

Meredith groaned. "This is not my day."

"At least, we're not stuck in here with a patient," Derek pointed out.

Meredith managed a small smile. "Yeah, George and Alex ended up doing that when we were interns. The workers managed to get the doors open enough for Dr. Burke to give out instructions on how to operate on the patient. Alex froze up while George did his first solo surgery."

"What about you?" he asked her. "Have you done your first solo surgery yet?"

Meredith stifled a laugh. "I wish."

"Don't worry. I'm sure you'll have your first solo surgery soon," he said.

Meredith gave him a look. "Let me guess, you already had yours?"

Derek laughed. "Would you be mad at me if I did?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, I wouldn't," she admitted. A few weeks ago, she would have been jealous, very jealous. Now, she didn't particularly cared.

"Good because I did," Derek replied and Meredith couldn't help but smile. "See, I can cheer you up."

Meredith then changed the subject. "So have you talked to Mark lately?"

Derek was surprised that she brought that up. He then realized that she was just trying to pass the time until they could get out. "Yeah. I suppose you know that everything's going well with Addison and the baby."

Meredith nodded. "I called her the other day. She's just thrilled that she's going to be a mom."

Derek gave her a smile. "You were too when you found out you were pregnant with Kylie," he replied. "You were so sure the baby was going to be a girl."

"That's because I wanted a daughter," Meredith said before there was a short pause. She wondered if she should tell him the next part. "And I read books about how to determine whether you're having a boy or girl."

Derek looked at her. "Really? I didn't know that. If I would have known that, I wouldn't have made that bet in the first place." When Meredith found out she was pregnant, he and Meredith made a bet on whether their baby was going to be a boy or girl. Meredith guessed correctly. Therefore, he had to take Meredith out to dinner.

"I still would have won even if you didn't bet about our child," Meredith joked.

Derek laughed as a voice came over the intercom. "Derek, this is Dr. Webber. Are you and Meredith all right in there?" Dr. Webber asked.

Derek pressed the intercom button before speaking. "Yes, but we would like to get out of here now."

"We're working on it."

"Do you think they did this on purpose?" Derek asked as he turned back to Meredith. She knew it was a joke and started laughing. He soon joined in. "Being an elevator with you isn't so bad." He then held out his hand.

She looked at him. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"We might be here awhile. And I'm sure your legs are getting tired from standing. And I don't think you want to sit on the hard floor. So let's dance."

Meredith gave him the same crazy look she had given Dr. Wyatt earlier. However, Derek wasn't offended. Instead, he encouraged her to take his hand. After a few more seconds, she finally did. "You do realize that there's no music?" she asked him.

Derek just smiled. "Don't ruin the moment." He then twirled her as she giggled. They moved across the floor, doing different dances. Surprisingly, Meredith found that she was having more fun than she thought she would.

He then dipped her and then started to pull her up again. As he did, she couldn't help stop staring into his eyes. She had forgotten how beautiful his eyes were. She started to lean closer and closer to him. She didn't even notice that he was leaning in as well. Their lips were about to touch when there was a little rumble. The elevator was moving again. They immediately pulled away from each other, realizing what they almost did.

Neither of them knew what to say. They were speechless as the elevator landed. The doors opened and Dr. Webber was there, waiting for them. "Are you two ok?" he asked. He was completely oblivious to the clear look that Derek and Meredith were giving each other.

Derek and Meredith suddenly snapped out of their dream. "Yeah, we're just fine," Derek finally replied before he walked out of the elevator. Meredith followed him out before they went their separate ways, still thinking of their almost kiss and the reasons behind it.


	9. Chapter Eight

A/N: Thank for the positive reviews.

Disclaimer: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Eight**

"You almost kissed McDreamy?" Christina asked Meredith as they jogged down the street. Meredith had just told Christina about what happened in the elevator. "Are you nuts? He's your ex-husband."

Meredith didn't know how to answer her. "I don't know what happened. We were dancing and the next thing I knew, our lips were coming together," she replied. "Why the hell would I do that?"

Christina gave her a look like it was obvious. "Hello, you're still in love with him." She hated when her friend was in denial.

"Of course I still love him. He was the father of my child," Meredith replied.

Christina shook her head. That was not what she meant. "No, I mean you are still in _love_ with him."

Meredith didn't believe her. "That's ridiculous," she replied. "You're confusing my feelings with the way I feel for him now."

Christina scoffed at her. She didn't believe her friend this time. "Come on, Mer. I've seen the way you two look at each other. That's not the look two friends have. It's the look that people have when they are in love."

"People don't fall in love with their ex again after divorcing," Meredith protested. "It just doesn't happen."

"Well, it sounds like to me that you two never should have divorced in the first place," Christina replied. Meredith was taken by surprise by her comment. She gave a thought as they continued down the road.

Once they got back, Meredith immediately went to the kitchen and to the fridge. She pulled out a water bottle and closed the fridge. She jumped as she saw Derek standing there. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's ok," Meredith replied as she started to twist the bottle cap. She groaned as she struggled to open it. Derek gestured her to give it to him. She tried one final time before she gave it to him. He easily twisted it and the bottle loosened. "Showoff."

Derek laughed as Meredith took a sip of her water. "So how are your sessions with Dr. Wyatt going?" he asked her, trying to make conversation.

"Good," Meredith quickly replied. Derek seemed satisfied with that answer. He didn't ask anything more of it. However, Meredith couldn't stand it any longer. "She's been trying to have me open up about the accident. And I couldn't."

Derek looked at her. "Meredith, you need to tell her about the accident."

"Derek, I can't," Meredith said. "It's too painful." After Kylie died, she never revealed much of the details of how it happened to anyone. Out of her friends, Christina was the only one who knew. She could relate since her dad died in a car accident when she was nine.

"Would it help if I go with you?" Derek asked her. She turned to him surprised. "I think it's about time that I talk about it too."

Meredith was grateful that he was willing to do that for her. However, she was unsure that it was the right thing to do. But her conscience took over and told her to let him. "Alright, I'll call Dr. Wyatt and ask her if it's ok that I bring you along to our next session."

* * *

Meredith and Derek sat down besides each other on the couch. Dr. Wyatt was sitting across from them on her chair. "How did the car accident happen?" she asked them.

Meredith and Derek looked at each other. Derek nodded his head in approval. Meredith cleared her throat and took a deep breath before telling the story. "It was shortly after Kylie's fourth birthday. That night, Derek was working late at the hospital. And she was dying to see him. So I decided to take her out for a surprise visit." There was a pause. "That was the biggest mistake I've ever made." Derek took his hand into hers and held it. She gave him a grateful smile as she continued. "I had stopped at a stoplight. The light turned green and I moved forward. Just then, a car came barreling out of nowhere and smashed into the right side of the car, right where Kylie was," she said as she felt tears form in her eyes. Derek squeezed her hand as Meredith tried to hold her tears in. But she couldn't.

"It was a stupid drunk driver," Derek added. "He didn't even apologize to us afterwards." He then gave a sad sigh. "I should have been with you instead working late. Otherwise, the car accident wouldn't have happened."

Meredith shook her head. "No, it's my fault. I shouldn't have brought her out that late anyway." They looked at each other, remembering that particular conversation shortly after Kylie's death where they had blamed each other for her accident.

_"What the hell were you thinking, Meredith?" Derek asked Meredith angrily. "Kylie shouldn't have been out this late."_

_Meredith gave him a look. "I thought it would be a nice surprise for her to see her daddy at work. You've been working late at the hospital the last few nights. We missed you."_

_"Can I help it if there are patients who need me?" Derek exclaimed. "Can I help it if I want to support my wife and daughter so we could have a home to come home to? I suppose you forgot about those classes that we need to pay for."_

_Meredith knew he had a point. However, that wasn't the topic that they were discussing. She hated when he went off topic. "Kylie needed you. I needed you. And you weren't there when she needed you the most," she replied angrily. _

_Derek gave her a confused look. "What are you talking about? I came as soon as I heard about the accident."_

_Again, he had a point. But he was getting off the subject again. "But you should have been home with us," Meredith replied. "You make it sound like work is more important than your family."_

_"That's not true. I love my work. I won't lie about that. But I love my family more," Derek replied. _

_"Well, you didn't show it tonight," Meredith told him before she left the room._

The memory faded away as Derek spoke again. "It wasn't really our faults, was it?" he said. "It just happened." Meredith just nodded as she dried her tears away. "I just wish it didn't happen to us." Meredith had to agree.

A short while later, Derek and Meredith left Dr. Wyatt's office. "Thank you for coming with me. I really needed that support," Meredith told Derek as they walked down the hall.

"You're welcome," Derek replied as he gave her a smile. "I'm sorry I didn't give it to you when I should have."

"I think we're both at fault there," Meredith said.

Derek then heard his pager go off. He groaned. "I got to go. I'll see you later."

Meredith nodded. "Yeah." She watched him as he went down the hall, wishing that they could be together again. She wanted to rewind the last three years and go back to the way they should have been after Kylie's death, comforting each other instead of fighting. She sighed sadly, knowing that couldn't happen. All she could do was push forward and move on with her life. It was the only thing she could do. The question was if she wanted Derek back in her life.


	10. Chapter Nine

**A/N**: As always, thank you for the awesome reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Nine**

Meredith was relieved when the plane finally landed safely on the ground. She didn't mind plane trips, but she never liked the landing. It always seemed so bumpy. Luckily, this was a smooth landing. So she had nothing to worry about. She anxiously waited until the signal came off to unbuckle their seatbelts. Finally, it did and Meredith unbuckled her seatbelt before getting under her seat to get her purse.

"I never thought I would go back here so soon," Derek said besides her as he started to gather his carryon bag from underneath his seat.

"You didn't have to come," Meredith pointed out.

"Yeah, you could have just stayed home," Lexie added as the three made their way into the aisle.

"No way. I wouldn't miss this for the world," Derek replied as they walked down the aisle and off the plane.

After walking for awhile, they finally reached the end of the terminal. They only had to look for a few minutes before finding Mark in the crowd. They walked over to him and he eagerly greeted them. "How's Addison?" Meredith asked him. She was dying to see her again.

"Addison's great. The baby's doing great. And everybody can't wait to see you," Mark replied. He then turned to Derek. "By the way, you're staying at your mom's."

Derek gave him a look. "What?"

"Sorry, but she insisted. I tried talking her out of it, but she won't budge. I guess she doesn't want you and Meredith to fight the whole time you're here," Mark replied. Derek was about to protest when Mark continued. "Oh come on. You don't want to be in that house with all those women." Meredith and Lexie gave him a look. "No offense."

"Ok, why don't we talk about this later?" Meredith asked. She really wanted to get going. So they stopped their conversation for now. Instead, they headed to the baggage claim.

A couple of hours later, they finally arrived back at the house after dropping Derek at his mother's first. Carolyn Shepherd had wanted them to stay awhile. However, Meredith and Lexie wanted to go and rest. But they promised that they would definitely visit during their trip.

Addison was on the front porch waiting for them. Meredith gave her best friend a wide smile as she climbed out. Addison walked over to her and gave her a tight squeeze. "I'm so glad you're here. A year is way too long," she said as she revealed her small baby bump.

"I know," Meredith replied. "But you know how it is."

Addison laughed as she gave Lexie a hug. "I have your rooms all ready. So you can go up and rest. I'm sure you're both tired from your flight, especially a flight with Derek along."

"Actually, they got along pretty well. They even sat next to each other on the plane," Lexie replied.

Addison looked at Meredith surprised. "Meredith Grey, you have changed. What happened to the woman who despised Derek Shepherd?"

Meredith laughed as they started walking towards the house. "I guess I gave him another chance." She didn't let Addison reply as they reached the front door. Addison then led Meredith and Lexie to the guestrooms before she left them.

* * *

An hour and a half later, Meredith emerged from the guestroom and wandered to the kitchen, where she saw Addison making lunch. "Hey, do you want something to eat? I can make you a turkey sandwich," Addison offered when she saw Meredith in the doorway.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah, that sounds great." She then looked around and listened for sound. There was none. "So where's Mark?" she asked as Meredith grabbed a chair at the kitchen table.

"He headed back to keep Derek company," Addison replied. "And Lexie is still resting. So it's just us girls." She brought their sandwiches over to the table. "So what's really going with you and Derek?"

"What do you mean?" Meredith asked.

Addison pretended to think for a moment. "The last time we talked, you mentioned how you and Derek were stuck in an elevator together. And you and Derek were going to therapy together. Is there something going on between you two that I don't know about?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, we're just friends. And Derek was the one who offered to come along to therapy. So I let him. And we have been going together ever since."

Addison was confused. "So you two are going to therapy together?"

"He's just there to give me support," Meredith replied. "And it helps him too." She then ate a bite of her sandwich as Addison gave her a confused look. "I don't know why we didn't think of doing that when we were together."

"It's because you two were too busy fighting," Addison replied. "So are you planning to go visit any of the Shepherd family before the party?"

Meredith gave her a smile. "I think they will come here before I even have a chance to think about it." Addison laughed. She had to agree.

After eating lunch, they waited until Lexie was up to go and see the sights again. Even though Meredith liked New York, it wasn't home. Seattle was home and she was glad that she had moved back there.

When dinner rolled around, the three met up with Mark and Derek at the Hard Rock Café. Then Derek and Meredith went for a walk so they could talk privately. "Have you talked to your family since you came back to Seattle?" Meredith asked curiously.

"Does Kathleen count?" Derek asked. Meredith gave him a look. "I didn't want them to hound me about you and me. Everyone else is." Meredith couldn't argue with that one. "They can't seem to understand that we're friends."

Meredith froze at the word 'friends'. Were they? She didn't know. The way that they had been acting towards each other was friendly enough. She knew it was more than just the truce that they made. She had a feeling that it was more than that. Derek knew it too. "Well, you know your family. They're just looking out for me," she teased him.

Derek laughed. "Oh really? You think so?" he asked playing along. "Are you sure that they won't side with me because you're following me this time?"

Meredith tried not to smile. "Yeah, I'm sure." There were a few moments of silence. "It's so hard during this time of year."

Derek had to agree. "I know. But we have friends and family to help us through. And we have each other."

Meredith was surprised that he had stayed that statement. But then she realized that he meant as friends. "I'm surprised that you decided to come with us. You didn't seem interested in coming last year."

"I had a business trip in Chicago last year. I couldn't say no to my boss," Derek replied. "It's not like I didn't want to be there."

Meredith knew he was right. "I know. I'm sorry."

Derek nodded understandingly. There was another silence. "Well, we better get back. Otherwise, they might think we eloped or something."

"Or worse," Meredith joked. They exchanged smiles as they turned around and started walking back to the restaurant.

* * *

The next afternoon, Meredith, Addison and Lexie were just finishing up setting the rest of the decorations when they heard the doorbell ring. "Meredith, could you get it?" Addison asked Meredith. Mark was picking up Derek and Mrs. Shepherd.

Meredith gave her a look. "Are you kidding? I'll probably get ambushed."

"I'll go since you're so worried," Lexie said and left the room. A few minutes later, Kathleen and her family came in. They greeted Meredith and Addison. The doorbell kept ringing until all of Derek's sisters and their families had arrived. Mark, Derek and Mrs. Shepherd were also in the crowd.

The crowd talked for awhile. Kathleen and Nancy were dying to know if their brother was misbehaving or not. Meredith defended him, but yet joked around about some of the stuff that they did together.

Soon, it was time to eat. They surrounded the dining room table with another small table set up for the children in the corner of the room. Wine was passed around to most of the group. Derek and Meredith stood at the head of the table. Meredith took a deep breath before speaking. "Before we eat, I would like to say a few words. We would like to thank you for coming here today, to support us through this rough time. Today would have been Kylie's eighth birthday. And we are grateful that all of you are here to celebrate her and her memory. To Kylie," Meredith said, raising her glass.

"To Kylie," the group replied, raising their glasses. They then took a sip before they sat down and started passing the food around.

"I'm surprised you didn't want to say anything," Meredith said.

Derek gave her a smile. "You said it all," he replied. "And I like to thank you for using 'we.' I heard you didn't include me in your speech last year. And again, I don't blame you."

Meredith smiled in return. "Well, she was _our_ daughter," she replied. "It wouldn't be right if I didn't include you."

"Thanks for that," Derek said.

"You're welcome," Meredith replied before they went back to eating their dinner.


	11. Chapter Ten

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews. This is the chapters I believe that everyone has been waiting for.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

On the anniversary of Kylie's death, Meredith and Derek along with Mark, Addison and Lexie went to the cemetery to put flowers on her grave. After a few minutes, Mark, Addison and Lexie went back to the car so Derek and Meredith could have some alone time.

"Hey, Kylie. It's your mommy. We celebrated your birthday the other day. All of your aunts and uncles came. You'd have loved it. We had cake and ice cream. You would have loved it because you would have been the center of attention," Meredith said with tears in her eyes. This day was always hard for her. But she had Derek and the rest of the family to help her get through it.

Derek just listened as she continued talking. She then started walking back towards the car when she noticed that Derek wasn't following her. "I'll be there soon. I would like to talk to Kylie alone," he explained.

Meredith nodded understandingly. "Take your time," she replied. She then walked through the cemetery and over to the car. She was dying to know what he was saying, but she couldn't read his lips from that distance.

"Are you afraid he's going to tattle on you?" Addison teased her. She knew what her friend was thinking. Meredith gave her a smile. "I can find out for you if you want. After all, his best friend is my husband."

Meredith smiled gratefully. "No, it's fine."

They then turned to see Derek walking back to the car. "Ok, let's go get some lunch," Addison said. "I'm starving."

"Of course you are. You're eating for two," Mark teased her. Addison gently hit him. "I know the perfect place."

A short while later, they arrived at the resteraunt. When they were brought to their table, Meredith took a seat next to Derek. He was surprised, but pleased. She didn't think anything of it. However, she noticed that everyone else was giving her looks. "What? I can't sit next to my ex-husband?" she asked them.

After ordering their drinks, the five started chatting about different topics. Derek and Meredith were in a deep conversation when they were interrupted by a voice. "Derek Shepherd, I thought that was you. I had no idea you were in New York."

Meredith turned to see a brunette standing over the group. "Well, I'm here just for a visit," Derek replied, embarrassed. "Rose, you remember Mark and Addison." Mark and Addison nodded in acknowledge. However, Meredith noticed that they both looked uncomfortable. "I would like you to meet Meredith and Lexie Grey. This is Rose."

Rose turned to Meredith. She was surprised, but gave her a smile. "So you're Meredith Grey? It's so nice to finally meet you. Derek has told me all about you and your daughter Kylie. I'm so sorry about what happened to her."

Meredith was so startled at first that she didn't know what to say. "Thank you." She wondered how Derek knew her.

"I'll let you go back to your lunch." She then turned to Derek. "But I do hope you stop by and visit me while you're here if it's not too awkward for you."

Meredith turned to her. "Why would it be awkward?" She looked from Derek to Rose confused.

Derek was about to stop Rose when she answered. "Because he's my ex-boyfriend." Meredith looked at Derek, who was more embarrassed than ever. "I got to go. I'll see you later." Rose then left the table as Meredith continued to glare at her ex-husband.

"I can't believe you," Meredith exclaimed before she got up from her chair. She walked past the tables and towards the exit. She could hear someone following her, but she didn't care. She was nearly across the street when she heard Derek call her.

He caught up with her and pulled her back. "What's your problem?" he demanded.

"You told me that you dated her for a few months," Meredith exclaimed.

Derek looked at her confused. "I did," he defended. He was still trying to understand why she was so upset.

"Then did you tell her your whole history with me and Kylie on your first date?" Meredith asked angrily. "Because that's not exactly a first date subject."

Derek was still confused. "Why are you getting so angry about this?" he asked her. Meredith didn't know how to answer him. She just turned around and continued walking. He then took a stab at it. "You're jealous, aren't you?"

Meredith scoffed at him. "You wish. You know, you haven't changed one bit, Derek Shepherd. I thought you did, but I guess I was wrong." She could hear him protest. But she continued. "She's a nice girl. And I don't know why you dumped her." She was about to go on when Derek stopped her this time.

"Because I love _you_," Derek called.

Meredith stopped dead in her tracks. She turned around and faced him. "What did you say?"

"I love you, Meredith Grey. I've spent the last three-and-a-half years being miserable. I didn't know why until I met Rose. She helped me realize that I made the stupidest mistake of my life when I let you walk out that night. I'm so sorry for being an ass. I should have fought for you, Meredith. I should have been helping you through Kylie's death instead of blaming you for the accident." He had said it before but he knew it was necessary to say it again. There was a short pause. "You're the real reason I came to Seattle. I want you back if you will take me back. My world hasn't been the same without you. And I don't care about all those other divorced couples who never got back together again. I care about you. And I love you. I've never stopped loving you," Derek said as he kept walking towards her. "And I know you feel the same way about me."

Meredith was speechless until his last statement. "How do you know that?" she asked.

Derek gave her a smile. "Because of this," he replied before he pulled her in for a passionate kiss. This time, nothing stopped them from having their kiss, not even Meredith.


	12. Chapter Eleven

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Eleven**

Meredith opened her eyes and looked around at the unfamiliar room. She couldn't remember where she was or how she got there. She then saw Derek in the bed sleeping soundly besides her. She looked down and gasped. Her eyes were wide in shock. She pushed off the covers and got out of the bed. She grabbed her robe from the edge of the bed and quickly put it on. She looked around the room and started to pick up her clothes that were spread out everywhere on the floor. She couldn't believe that she had spent the night sleeping with her ex-husband, not to mention have sex with him. Of course, that was what they always did when they made up.

Meredith slowly walked out towards the door, hoping that Derek wouldn't wake up. She really didn't want to talk to him right now. She sighed relieved once she reached the door. Derek didn't stir from the bed. She gently pulled the door shut behind her and went into the bathroom. The shock was now wearing off. But it was still impossible to believe that she actually slept with Derek after all this time.

She turned the shower knob to the temperature she wanted and waited as the water warmed up. She tried to remember what happened the night before, but it was still just a blur. She thought for a moment, wondering if she had too much to drink the night before. She then shook her head. She knew she would never get drunk that much, especially on the anniversary of Kylie's death.

Meredith then stepped in the shower and let the hot water droplets hit her face before she turned around. As she was washing up, she couldn't help but try and think of the events the night before. But the last thing she remembered doing was the kiss between her and Derek. She couldn't figure out why though. And it was driving her nuts.

After taking a hot shower and putting her clothes back on, she went downstairs to the kitchen. She saw that Addison was already up. "There you are. We were worried about you. You and Derek seemed to disappear after you left the restaurant," she told her. "We would had come and try to find you if Derek hadn't called. He told Mark that you two were going to go for another walk. What happened?"

Meredith didn't answer at first. "Well, we made up."

Addison gave her a confused look. "What do you mean? You had a fight and made up afterwards?"

Meredith tried not to smile. "Well, it was a little more than that."

Addison looked at her friend hard. "Meredith Grey, what did you do?" Meredith told her what had happened. However, she didn't have a chance to tell anything past the kiss. "Wait, he finally admitted that he came to Seattle for you and then you kissed?"

Meredith turned to her. "You knew he came there for me?"

"I had my suspicions he did, especially the way he left," Addison replied. "One day, he was with Rose. The next day, he had packed up and nobody knew where he disappeared off to." She then changed the subject back to the story. "So did you confess your love for him?"

Meredith remained quiet. "No, not exactly."

Addison looked at her shocked. "What? Why not?" she asked. Meredith was about to reply when she continued. "Don't you even try to deny that you're not still in love with him. Because everyone knows it, even if you're not willing to admit it."

"I don't know," Meredith replied with a frustrated groan. Her feelings were all mixed up about everything. "I guess I'm afraid of getting hurt again. After all, he was the one who was being a McAss. I was only trying to help. Why should I take him back?"

"Because he knows what he did was wrong. And he did ask for your forgiveness," Addison pointed out. "But I can't tell you what to do. You're going to have to figure this out for yourself."

"How the hell am I going to do that?" Meredith asked.

"I suggest you start with talking to Derek about your feelings and where you guys stand on your relationship now," Addison replied.

Meredith knew she was right. However, she didn't have a chance to say anything as Lexie came downstairs. "Hey, is everything ok?" she asked, noticing that it suddenly got quiet as soon as she arrived.

"Yeah, everything's fine," Meredith replied as she went to the fridge to find something for breakfast.

* * *

Meredith, Addison and Lexie were busy chatting when Derek came downstairs. Lexie and Addison exchanged confused looks. Clearly, they weren't expecting Derek to be there. They thought he was at his mother's house. "Hey, there are still some bacon and eggs left if you want any," Meredith offered, hoping Derek didn't notice the looks.

"Actually, I'm going to grab something over at Rose's apartment," Derek replied. "Where's Mark?"

Before Addison could answer, Meredith spoke up. "You're going over to Rose's apartment now?"

Derek nodded. "Yeah, I promised that I would stop and visit while we're here, remember?" he reminded her.

Meredith did remember that. "We really need to _talk_ though. And I'd rather do it sooner than later."

"We'll do it after I get back. I'll be back in a few hours," Derek replied.

"Mark went to work his shift. You'll have to get a cab or walk, whichever you'd prefer," Addison told Derek.

Derek nodded in acknowledgement as Meredith gave Addison a look. "How can I talk to him if you're helping him to go out the door," she said through gritted teeth. She then hurried after Derek to the front door.

"Meredith, I agree with you that we really need some time to think about everything. This is scary for me too. We'll talk about this after I come back. I promise," Derek said before he walked out.

Meredith then knew that Derek had overheard the conversation that she and Addison had. She didn't know if he was having mixed feelings too or he just said that to make her feel better. She wished she knew what she wanted. It would make the decision a lot easier. "I'm going to go take a walk," Meredith called.

"Do you want us to go with you?" Lexie asked as she and Addison came into the front hall.

"No, I need some time alone," Meredith replied as she went out the door. As she walked through the streets, memories of happy times came back to her. She couldn't help but smile as she thought of those wonderful times with Derek and Kylie.

_Derek and Meredith turned to see their three-year-old daughter in the doorway. "Happy Easter," she said, giving Kylie a smile._

_"Happy Easter," Kylie replied happily. _

_"Let's go look in the family room and see if the Easter Bunny left anything in for you," Derek said. _

"_Easter Bunny," Kylie exclaimed and ran towards the family room. Derek and Meredith laughed. Derek then got the video camera while Meredith followed Kylie. _

_"What do you have in there?" Meredith asked as she and Kylie took a seat on the couch. Derek was filming away._

_"Bunny," Kylie told her mother, showing her new bunny that was next to her Easter basket. _

_Meredith smiled. "Cool."_

"_Book," Kylie replied, showing Meredith her new coloring book. "And crayons."_

_"I guess the Easter Bunny knew you needed some new ones," Meredith replied as she winked at Derek. "What else did you get?"_

_"Candy," Kylie replied as she took one of the plastic Easter eggs out of the basket._

_"Why don't we save those for later?" Meredith asked. _

_Kylie didn't even pay attention. Instead, she was looking in the basket for more presents. "Mommy, look," she said as she pulled a book out. "What is it?"_

"_It's The Tale of Peter Rabbit," Meredith said, reading the cover. "Now are you ready for your Easter egg hunt?"_

"_Yeah," Kylie exclaimed happily as she grabbed her basket. _

"_Alright. Then we got to get ready for church and then we'll go over to Grandma Shepherd's house. You'll get to see your cousins and maybe the Easter bunny left more presents for you over there. And there's going to be another Easter egg hunt. Does that sound like fun?" Derek asked Kylie. She nodded as she smiled to the camera. _

"_Then it's on with the hunt," Meredith added as Kylie got off the couch._

Meredith sighed. She was never big on holidays before she had Kylie. Her mother wasn't one who would put in the effort to buy presents for her daughters or spend the day with them. Most times, it was just a day where Meredith would relax and do nothing. Of course, everything changed once she met Derek. That was when she truly felt like she was part of a family. At first, it was weird and uncomfortable, but soon got used to it. She even started inviting Lexie to special events like birthdays and holidays.

She then heard a familiar voice. "Hey, there you are." She was surprised when she saw Derek walking towards her.

"I thought you were heading over to Rose's apartment," Meredith replied, not looking at him.

Derek shrugged. "I was before I realized that I didn't really want to go. I just wanted to get out and have some time to think about our relationship, if you want to call it that," he replied.

"And what did you decide?" Meredith asked him. She had a feeling she knew what his answer would be.

"Actually, I think that's really up to you," Derek replied. Meredith turned to him surprised. She wondered what he meant by that. "After all, you haven't decided whether or not you want to give us a second chance."

Meredith knew that this was the perfect time to talk. "How do I know that you won't hurt me again?" she asked. "Ok, I have to admit that I also said some hurtful words to you. But I was never as cruel with my words as you were with yours. And I know some of those weren't just the drinking talking." There was a short pause. "But if you're willing to prove to me that you deserve a second chance, then we can talk about us again."

Derek nodded understandingly. "It's not the answer I was thinking of, but I'll take it," he replied.


	13. Chapter Twelve

**A/N**: As always, thanks for the awesome reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Twelve**

Meredith munched on her carrots as she listened to Christina and Izzie talking about different subjects. The conversation soon turned uninteresting. She instead turned to the table across the room where Derek was sitting with George and Alex again. Meredith was surprised that Derek didn't want to join them since they were friends now.

She couldn't stop thinking of that week in New York, especially Derek's confession. She would have done the same thing if she wasn't so afraid of getting hurt again. She knew that she had done the right thing not to take him back right away. She felt that he should prove his love to her, even though she had no idea how he would do that.

"Would you stop staring at McDreamy?" Christina asked Meredith, making her snap out of her daydream. "He's not going to come over here and sit with us. You must have really made him angry if he's keeping his distance from you."

Meredith gave her a questioning look. "What?"

"The whole hospital is talking about what happened between you two in New York," Izzie replied. "Since neither of you two is sharing any details, we have to do the next best thing. And that is guess."

Christina looked at Meredith angrily. "Yeah, and I'm supposed to be your best friend. How the hell can you not tell me what happened in New York?"

"Did anything happen in New York?" Izzie asked curious.

Meredith gave her friends a look. "See, this is why I don't want to tell anybody anything." She then angrily picked up her tray and left the table. She walked over to a trash can and threw her tray away. She ignored the looks that she was getting as she walked towards the exit.

As she went down the hall, she heard a familiar voice call her name. She gave a heavy sigh as Derek caught up to her. "I suppose you heard the rumors about us," Derek told her.

Meredith shrugged, avoiding his gaze. "I'm used to it. There have been rumors about us ever since you got here," she replied. "So it's nothing new."

Derek was confused by her attitude. "Are you angry at me or something?" he asked as he pulled her arm back. She turned to him, a little annoyed. "Is this because I've been avoiding you?"

Meredith didn't know how to answer. She started to say something when she changed her mind. She groaned frustrated. "I thought we were friends," she exclaimed.

"We are," Derek hissed as he shushed her. People were starting to stare. Meredith was suddenly embarrassed about fighting with Derek in the hallway. He felt the same way so he pulled her gently down the hall away from the crowd. "I just thought that you need some space from me."

"Why?" she asked him confused. "You know, I may have told you that I'm not ready for us to get back together again. But that doesn't mean we still couldn't be friends."

Derek groaned frustrated. "You are so hard to figure out these days. I understand that you would be upset with me for coming here. I don't blame you for that. And I understand about not wanting to have a relationship right away. I get that and I respect your decision. But I don't understand is why you always make me look like the bad guy."

"You were," Meredith said. "But you're not now."

"Apparently, I still am according to these rumors," Derek replied. Meredith was about to reply when he continued. "Normally, I don't listen to rumors. But this is getting ridiculous."

"Why are you blaming me?" Meredith exclaimed. "I didn't start those rumors." She hated that Derek was accusing her when he knew that she didn't do anything wrong.

Derek tried to calm her down. "I know you didn't. But why don't you set the record straight?" he asked. "That way, there will be no more rumors about us."

Meredith gave him a look. "You want_ me_ to do it? What about you? You are the one who really started this whole thing."

Derek sighed. "Ok, we'll both do it," he replied before he gave her a kiss on the cheek.

Meredith was surprised. "What was that for?"

"Well, I want to make sure that people get the right idea about us," Derek replied before he left her standing in the hallway, staring after him.

* * *

Meredith walked into the house. She was burnt out after the long shift that she had just worked. However, it was a successful night. She was able to save her patients, with a little help from Derek. At first, they had argued about how to treat the patient. They were finally able to work it out and found a solution. The patient now was resting comfortably for the night.

Meredith didn't want to admit that she had missed working with Derek. They always had such fun, except when they lost patients. They always comforted each other when they did. She had missed everything about him. She knew that she loved Derek. She was just afraid to say it.

She walked through the foyer and into the kitchen. She opened up the fridge and looked for something to eat. She grabbed an apple from the fruit drawer and then closed the fridge. She went over to the kitchen sink and washed the apple. She then jumped as she heard thunder. She looked out the window and saw that the dark clouds were rolling in.

"I hope Derek and Lexie gets home ok," Meredith said to herself. She would hate if they got caught up in the big rainstorm. She then started munching on the apple as she heard the rain pounding on the roof. She went to the family room and turned on the television to the weather channel. Sure enough, Seattle was set for a thunderstorm the rest of the evening.

She changed the station to a different channel. As she got comfortable, she heard the front door open. She got up and went to the foyer, wondering who it was. "It looks like I got here just in time. It's raining cats and dogs out there," Derek told her as he took off his jacket and put it on the coat rack.

"Where's Lexie?" Meredith asked curiously.

"She was still hanging out at the bar when I left," Derek replied. "She'll probably stay there until the storm is over." There was then an awkward silence. "I think I'm going to go to bed. It's been a long day."

Meredith nodded. She watched him go up the stairs before she decided to speak. "Derek, there's something you need to know about the night of the accident." She had been hiding this secret for years. She had told Dr. Wyatt before Derek had decided to join her with the sessions. Celebrating the anniversary of Kylie's death last week made her think of it and she couldn't stop thinking about it.

Derek was confused as he walked back down the stairs. "What?" he asked, frowning.

Meredith took a deep breath before speaking again. "I want you to know the real reason I was bringing Kylie to the hospital that night." There was a short pause. It was too short because then a pager went off. She groaned as she went to check whose pager it was. She turned to Derek. "It's yours."

"They must have thought I was still at Joe's," Derek replied with a sigh. He then walked down the stairs and grabbed his jacket off of the coat rack. He put his coat back on. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

Meredith gave him a look. "You just said that it's raining cats and dogs out there." She wondered why he would go out in the middle of a rainstorm like that, even if he was paged.

"I think I can handle it," Derek replied as he went to the door. "Don't wait up."

Meredith didn't know what to do. So she did the only thing she could think of. "I was pregnant that night, Derek," she blurted out. Derek turned to her shocked. "I had just found out. And Kylie was there. So she wanted to tell you. But when the car accident happened, I had a miscarriage. We were already devastated by Kylie's death. I didn't want to add this on."

"After all these years, I can't believe you kept that from me," Derek replied. "We were still husband and wife then. We were supposed to tell each other everything." He shook his head in disbelief. "I got to go." Meredith was about to speak when he continued. "Don't, Meredith." He then slammed the door, making the whole house vibrate a little.

Meredith sighed as she watched from the window Derek pull out of the driveway. She now wished that she had told him in the first place. But it was too late. She knew that Derek would never forgive her. However, she knew that she had to try. She wasn't going to give up. She had given up before with him when he was drinking. But she wasn't going to now. She loved him too much. She was going to do whatever it takes, no matter what.


	14. Chapter Thirteen

**A/N**: Thank you for all the awesome reviews. And I like to wish everyone a Happy Mother's Day! Double celebration for me since my birthday ended up on Mother's Day this year. So all I ask from my lovely readers are reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen**

Meredith jumped as she heard a clap of thunder. She had been sleeping on the couch when the thunder woke her up. She yawned as she looked at her watch. It was late, really late. She was surprised that Derek and Lexie hadn't come back yet. She then looked out the window and saw that the rain was coming down hard. She jumped again as she heard a faint ringing sound. She groaned as she got up from the couch. She went over to her purse and pulled it out. She opened her cell and pressed the talk button. "Hello?"

_"Meredith, it's Lexie. Have you seen Derek? He was paged, but hasn't shown up yet,"_ Lexie told her.

Meredith suddenly had a funny feeling in the pit of her stomach. "No, I haven't. And he left hours ago." She then tried to think of where he could be. She then realized where he was. "I think I know where he is." She didn't let her sister answer. Instead, she hung up and grabbed her car keys from the table. She rushed over to the coat rack and grabbed her coat. She quickly put it on as she heard thunder again.

She ran out to the car, not really caring if she got wet. She had to find Derek and talk to him before he did something he would regret. She hoped that he'd be where she thought he would be.

After the windshield wipers were turned on, she slowly pulled away from the curb. She tried to keep her mind on the road as she started driving through the streets. Luckily, the rain wasn't coming down as hard as it was earlier, which made it easier to drive.

It seemed like forever before she arrived at Derek's former home. However, it didn't look like he was there. However, she wanted to make sure. So she got out of the car and walked over to the trailer. She could now see that the lights were off. Derek was definitely not there. She groaned frustrated. She started to go back to her car when she heard another car pull up. She recognized it as Derek's car. She sighed relieved as Derek got out of the car. "What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded.

"I could ask you the same question," Meredith replied. "Lexie called me. You never showed up at the hospital after you were paged."

Derek gave her a look. "How could I after you dropped that bomb on me?" he exclaimed. "You caught me completely off guard and you expect me to be ok with it right away?"

Meredith had no good excuse for that. "I'm sorry, ok? I wanted to be honest with you. And I felt guilty for hiding it from you, especially after we started to become friends. So I was trying to find the right time to tell you."

"And so you decided the right time is when I'm going out the door to answer a page?" he asked her. The rain had stopped completely by then and they could see each other clearly.

"You were going out in the middle of a rainstorm," Meredith replied. "I had to say something to stop you from going out."

"We're not married anymore. So you don't need to that concerned about me," Derek told her.

"Do I?" Meredith asked him. "Because I remember the last time you received devastating news," she snapped. "And I think your drinking would have been worse if I told you that when we were dealing with Kylie's death."

"Do you really think I went to drink? Don't you think I've changed since then?" Derek asked her. Meredith didn't even have a chance to answer. "Not that it's any of your business, but I just took a drive to clear my head about everything. Are you satisfied?" he asked as he walked past her and into the trailer. He slammed the door and left Meredith out in the cold.

* * *

"I can't believe he did that to you. Of course, I can't believe you kept that a secret from him after all these years," Lexie exclaimed after Meredith had told her the story. The sisters had come back at the house around the same time. "I hate to say it, but he's right. You should have told him back then."

Meredith couldn't believe her sister was agreeing with Derek. "May I remind you that we just lost Kylie? Do you really think that I should have brought us more pain? Do you really think that would have changed anything? It could have made things worse," she replied.

"You don't know that. You two could have gotten closer instead of further apart," Lexie said.

"It doesn't matter now. Derek hates me," Meredith replied. She really didn't want to believe it, but she wouldn't blame him if he did feel that way.

Lexie looked at her. "He doesn't hate you. He's just a little upset with you. That's all. I'm sure he'll come around."

Meredith sighed. "I don't know, Lex. You didn't see the way he looked at me after I told him."

* * *

"How long is McDreamy is going to stay mad at you? It's been like a week already," Izzie asked Meredith one evening at Joe's. She, Lexie and Christina were sitting together with Meredith while Derek was sitting across the room with Alex and George.

"Week-and-a-half, but who's counting?" Meredith grumbled.

"He's being a McAss," Christina added as she shot daggers at Derek. "He should just get over it."

Meredith sighed. "I wish it was that easy. He's been avoiding not only me, but Lexie too. He even moved back to his trailer," she told them before she went to the counter. She ordered some drinks before Joe went to make them. As she waited, she saw at the corner of her eyes that Derek was coming over to the counter. They avoided each other's gaze as Derek ordered his drinks. Neither of them said anything.

Meredith waited impatiently until the drinks were ready. She wanted to get away from Derek as soon as possible. She could tell that he was thinking the same thing about her. She then quickly brought the drinks back to her friends without saying a word to Derek.

As the night wore on, she tried to join in on the fun and friendly conversation. But her friends could tell that she wasn't in the mood. "I think I'm going to call it a night," she told them. Her friends understood and let her go. She didn't even glanced Derek's way as she walked past his table. She went through the door and onto the sidewalk. She started walking across the street. She was so preoccupied with thinking about different things that she didn't hear someone call her name at first. She started to turn around to see who it was when she saw a car coming down the road, headed straight for her. She froze in fear. The squealing of brakes were heard. Then there was silence.


	15. Chapter Fourteen

**A/N**: Thank for the awesome reviews.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen**

Meredith felt a blow to her stomach as she was pulled to the ground. She snapped out of her thoughts and looked around. She saw that the car had stopped just in time. She was also surprised when she saw that Derek was besides her. She couldn't believe that he was the one who pulled her out of the way. "Are you ok?" he asked her. Her head was still spinning with the shock of it all.

It took a few moments, but she finally nodded. The shock was slowly wearing off. "Yeah, I think so," she said as Derek helped her up. "That was a close call."

"A little too close," Derek replied as the driver of the car got out. He wanted to make sure that she wasn't hurt. "She's fine," he assured the driver. The driver then nodded before he drove on his way. Derek then turned back to Meredith. "Come on. I'll take you back to the hospital, just to make sure you aren't suffering any trauma or anything," he offered.

"Derek, it's not like I hit my head," Meredith replied. She wondered why he was being so concerned all of a sudden. "I just have a little stomach pain," she said as she started to feel a little queasy.

"Well, I'm getting checked out. And I insist you do too," Derek replied.

Meredith sighed. She knew Derek wouldn't back down. She finally gave up. "Fine, but don't blame me when you find out that I'm right and you're wrong," she said as they headed back towards the hospital.

They stopped for a moment when Lexie came running over to them. "Hey, is everything ok?" she asked them. She could see the way that they were moving that something had happened. Before Meredith could stop him, Derek told Lexie what happened. She suddenly grew concerned for her sister. "Oh my God, are you ok?"

Meredith was already tired of hearing that question. And it was only the second time. "Yes, I just have a little stomach cramp. That's all."

"Well, I'm going to check you out," Lexie told her.

* * *

"I can't believe I'm letting you do this when I am feeling fine. I have just a little stomach pain," Meredith said as Lexie started her examination.

"It never hurts to make sure that everything's ok," Lexie replied as she looked on the ultrasound. She looked closely at it to make sure she was seeing what she thought she was seeing. "Well, you definitely don't have any bleeding or anything."

Meredith sighed relieved. "I told you that there was nothing to worry about."

Lexie didn't answer her at first. Instead, she tried not to smile as she asked her next question. "How long have you and Derek been sleeping together?" she asked her, trying to keep a straight face.

Meredith gave her a look. "Lexie, what rumors have you been hearing? I only slept with him that one time in New York. You know that." She hated that those rumors about her and Derek were still going around.

"Remember earlier when I told you should have told Derek about your second pregnancy right away instead of waiting?" Lexie asked her. Meredith nodded, trying to understand where her sister was getting at. "Well, I have a feeling that he would feel the same way now."

Meredith looked at her, confused. "What are you talking about?" She hated when Lexie was beating around the bush instead of telling her straightaway.

Lexie didn't answer at first since she wasn't sure how her sister would take the news. "This might be hard to believe, but you're pregnant," she replied.

Meredith looked at her shocked before turning to the ultrasound. She gasped as she looked at the tiny form that was clearly her baby. "Oh my god! I'm pregnant."

"And since you and Derek only had sex that one night, I'm guessing that you're five weeks along," Lexie replied.

Meredith still couldn't believe it. She didn't have a chance to say anything as her friends came in. They had heard about the accident from Derek and were dying to know if she's alright. "Is that what I think it is?" George asked as he suddenly noticed the ultrasound.

There were squeals of delight from Izzie and the questions started all over again. "Hey, what is everybody doing over here?" asked an annoyed Dr. Bailey as she came over. She then noticed Meredith and was surprised.

"She almost got hit by a car and Derek wanted her to get checked out," Lexie explained.

"Ok then. Everybody else out or I'll put you to work," Dr. Bailey warned them and the three friends quickly disappeared. Dr. Bailey then left as well.

"Ok, I'll finish up so you can go tell Derek," Lexie told Meredith.

"He'll probably know by the time I tell him. After all, the whole hospital just saw the ultrasound," Meredith replied.

"I'll talk to them and make sure that they don't tell anybody until after you tell Derek," Lexie promised her.

Meredith managed a smile. "Thanks, Lexie."

A few minutes later, she arrived in the lobby, where Derek was waiting for her. "So is everything ok?" Derek asked. Meredith nodded. "Great. If you don't mind, I'll drive us home. Or are we waiting for Lexie?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, she's going to let us go ahead." She suddenly grew nervous as they walked toward the exit. He opened the door for her and she thanked him. She kept telling herself to say it, but she didn't. She wished that she wasn't such a chicken. It was so easy before. But they were husband and wife then. Now, she didn't even know if they were friends.

Before she could say anything else, Derek spoke up. "I want to apologize for my actions last week. I was just so upset and angry that you didn't feel like you couldn't tell me about it when it happened. After all, we were best friends. We were supposed to tell each other everything."

Meredith nodded understandingly. "I know. And I'm sorry too. I thought we shouldn't have that burden of losing another child when we just lost one." She then sighed as they reached his car. "Derek, Lexie did find something." Derek's eyes grew worried until Meredith calmed him down. "It's nothing bad. It's just that it's something unexpected that neither of us planned to happen."

Derek looked at her confused. "What do you mean?"

Meredith took a deep breath before speaking. "I'm pregnant." She waited for his reaction.

Derek just stared at her in shock. It took a few seconds before he finally spoke. "What?"

"I'm pregnant," Meredith repeated.

Derek couldn't believe his ears. "Congratulations. Who's the father?"

Meredith gave him a look. "You are."

Derek just laughed as she looked at him surprised. She couldn't believe that he was taking this as a joke. "Very funny, Meredith. We haven't had sex in a few years."

"Then I guess you forgot about our New York trip we took a little over a month ago," Meredith reminded him. She wasn't going to let him deny it. "Because that's when it happened."

Derek nodded, now remembering. "So what do you want to do?" he asked her.

"I don't know," Meredith replied. She didn't really thought about it too much. Her mind had been on how she was going to tell him. "I thought we could decide together."

Derek nodded again. "Good idea."


	16. Chapter Fifteen

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews. I thought about waiting for a few more days until Grey's Anatomy finale. But I couldn't wait any longer.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie Shepherd

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen**

Derek and Meredith stood across from each other, not saying a word. Neither of them had said much since they arrived back at the house. The silence was deafening. They knew that they had to talk about the baby. But neither of them knew where to start.

"Are you sure you're pregnant?" Derek asked her.

Meredith was surprised by his question. She started to think back of how she had been feeling the past few weeks. "Well, now looking back, the signs were all there. I just didn't pay attention because I was too focused on you."

Derek gave her a look. "I was just trying to give you some space."

"I didn't need space," Meredith protested. She was tired of hearing him saying that.

She didn't have a chance to continue as Derek interrupted her. "You had just told me that I had to prove myself before we could start talking about starting a relationship again. So I thought the right thing to do was to give you some space." He then sighed as he started to calm down. His angry tone soon became lower. "God, what happened to us? Every time we are near each other, we start fighting, especially about the past."

"That's because the past is what made us divorce," Meredith replied as she gave a sigh. She managed a small smile as she had a thought. "Can you imagine what Kylie would say if she could see her parents now?"

Derek shook his head. "She would probably be upset that Mommy and Daddy are fighting."

Meredith had to agree. Kylie would be upset if she saw her parents fighting. She smiled as she started to think back about Kylie. "She would probably try and have us kiss and make up like she used to do. I remember that we had to tell her that sometimes parents fight, but it didn't mean that we didn't love each other."

Derek looked at her. "Look, I'm sorry about the way I reacted to your news. It's just that I didn't expect us to end up pregnant."

"Neither did I," Meredith admitted.

Derek gave another sigh. "So what do you want to do?" Meredith didn't answer at first. She was still thinking. "I understand if you'd want an abortion. But I don't want you to." She turned to him as he continued. "We made this baby. And I don't want to deprive this baby of life just because we're not together. It wouldn't be fair."

"So what are you saying?" Meredith asked him. "You want to have this baby?"

"Do you remember when we found out we were pregnant with Kylie?" Derek asked her. Meredith nodded. "We weren't sure if we wanted Kylie. After all, we were still in medical school. And we were working long shifts at the hospital. It wasn't going to be easy. But we were determined to make it work. And we can do that now, even with us not being together." Meredith didn't answer at first. Instead, she was thinking back to the day that she had found out that she was pregnant before she told Derek.

_Meredith jumped as she heard the timer dinged. She quickly looked at the results. She gasped as she looked closely at the positive pregnancy test. She was startled when she suddenly heard rapping on the bathroom door. "Mere, are you ok?" Addison called. _

_"Yeah, I'll be right out," Meredith called back as she put the pregnancy test back into the box. She then frantically looked for a place to hide it. She knew that she couldn't just throw it in the trash. It was always the first place anyone would accidently look. Of course this was the fourth pregnancy test in a row that she took. So it wouldn't be easy to hide another one. She just decided to take a chance and threw it into the wastebasket. She then washed her hands with cold water and dried them on a towel before walking out of the bathroom._

_"What is going on with you?" Addison demanded._

_Meredith shrugged as she walked past her. "Nothing."_

_She could hear Addison hurrying to catch up with her. She came in front of Meredith and stopped her. She narrowed her eyes and looked at her best friend. "Mere, I'm a baby expert. Don't you think I've noticed how tired you've been, the constant urge to go to the bathroom all the time, how your ankles have been swelling up and the so-called flu you had for the last few weeks?"_

_Meredith managed a smile. "Either you're that good or I suck at trying to hide this secret."_

_Addison looked at her friend. "So it's true? You're really pregnant?"_

_"That's what the four pregnancy tests I took said," Meredith replied. Addison was surprised. "Well, I've never been pregnant before. I wanted to make sure." The realization of her unexpected pregnancy finally hit her. She started to grow worried as the millions of questions ran through her head. "How am I going to tell Derek?"_

_"Tell him the truth. He'll understand. In fact, he'll probably be thrilled about it. You two had always wanted a baby," Addison pointed out._

_Meredith knew that was true. "Yes, but we wanted to wait after we were done with medical school."_

_"Well, there's always a reason for everything. And I'd say that fate has other things in store for you and Derek than just medical school," Addison replied. "Derek loves you. And he will love this baby. And you two will raise this baby together."_

_"How do you know that?" Meredith asked. "Can you predict the future?"_

_Addison just gave her a smile. "I don't have to. Whatever your differences are, you and Derek are always going to find a way to work it out. It's obvious that you two belong together," she replied. _

Meredith snapped out of her daydream and turned back to Derek. He was patiently waiting for her answer. "Do you really think we can do this?" she asked him.

Derek gave her a smile. "I know we can," he replied.

Meredith smiled in return. "Then let's do it."

* * *

"Let me get this straight, you and McDreamy are going to raise McBaby, even though you're not together?" Christina asked Meredith the next morning as they were walking down the hall. Meredith had just got done telling her the conversation that they had late last night and Christina couldn't believe the final decision.

Meredith gave her a look. "It wouldn't be right for us to abort the baby. After all, that would be punishing the baby when the baby didn't do anything wrong."

"Have you two ever thought about adoption?" Christina asked her. "Because I don't remember you mentioning that in your story."

"It was never brought up," Meredith replied. She didn't even have to think about it. She knew that it wasn't discussed and wouldn't ever be. "And I couldn't bear give my child away. We didn't do it with Kylie. And we certainly aren't going to do it with this baby. I had promised myself that I would be a better mother than my mother ever was to me and Lexie. It's no wonder my father left her." She then felt sick to her stomach and knew what was coming. She covered her mouth and rushed to the nearest bathroom. Luckily, she was able to hold it until she was leaning over the toilet.

After a few minutes of waiting, she got up and came out of the stall. She was a little embarrassed as she saw Callie at one of the bathroom sinks. She was hoping that she didn't run into anybody because she knew that she would have to answer questions about her and her relationship with Derek. It was a complicated situation and nobody understood that. She hoped that she could just wash her hands without starting a conversation.

She walked over to the sink and turned on the water. She started to get her hands wet and waited. There was only a few seconds of silence before Callie spoke. "So I've heard that you and Dr. Shepherd are going to have a baby. Congratulations."

"Thank you," Meredith replied.

"But you're not in a relationship?" Callie asked confused. She then realized her mistake. "Sorry. It's none of my business. Forget I asked." Meredith didn't say anything as Callie went to the towel dispenser and pulled out a paper towel. "I'm just curious since there are so many different rumors about you and Dr. Shepherd that I don't know which ones to believe."

Meredith didn't say anything as she turned off the water. "You shouldn't believe everything you hear. But since we are friends, you should know that Derek and I are not in a relationship. We're just friends, but we're willing to raise this baby together."

Callie nodded understandingly. "Oh, I see."

Meredith noticed the tone. Instead of replying to it, she decided to ignore it. She knew that it was what everyone would be thinking once they found out the truth. They would think she was crazy to raise a baby with Derek when they're not in a relationship together. She watched as Callie left before turning to the mirror. She started to think if she was doing the right thing, especially since she and Derek weren't dating. She soon heard a small voice inside her that told her that everything would work out fine, even with Derek. She thought for a moment and she could have sworn the voice was Kylie's. That gave her the confidence that she needed to believe that it was the right choice to keep the baby. Yet, she pondered over the thought if everything would truly work out with Derek.

She was so distracted by the thought that she didn't hear her pager at first. She looked down to check what it was and sighed. She knew that she had to get back to work. She quickly grabbed a paper towel from the dispenser and wiped her hands off. She then threw it in the trashcan before heading out of the bathroom, forgetting all about Derek.


	17. Chapter Sixteen

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews. And I'm once again letting my readers decide whether they want a boy or girl for Mere and McDreamy. So if you want a say, please go to my profile and vote.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie and the unborn babies

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen**

Meredith was busy working on her labtop at the kitchen table when she heard the phone ring. She sighed, knowing that she had to be the one who had to pick it up. Both Derek and Lexie were out. That made it easier to work. However, there were still the little sounds like a phone ringing to bother her. She debated on whether to let the machine pick it up. She finally decided to answer it. She quickly shut her laptop down. She then hurried over to the phone and picked it up. "Hello?"

She soon heard Addison's voice. _"Meredith, how have you been? I haven't heard much from you since you left New York. I know you're busy with patients. But I thought you would call your pregnant best friend once in awhile."_

"I'm pregnant," Meredith suddenly blurted out. She then quietly cursed herself for doing that.

There was silence on the other end. Meredith knew that her friend was shocked. _"I'm sorry. Did you just say pregnant?"_

"Yeah, I did. I am."

_"Wait a minute; this happened on the New York trip, didn't it?" _Addison asked her. Meredith went on to answer what she knew before Addison could ask any more questions. _"Good for you and McDreamy."_ Meredith was surprised that Addison was calling him that. But she didn't push it. _"I'm glad you two are keeping the baby. That way, my little one can play with yours. Speaking of mine, Mark and I are fighting over baby names."_

"Do you know the sex of the baby?" Meredith asked her curious.

_"No, and we don't want to know. But I think that's the problem because Mark's so confident that it's a boy that he won't even think about girl names. I keep telling him that we need to have a few girl names just in case. But he never listens to me."_

"Does he ever?" Meredith joked.

She could hear Addison laugh on the other end. "_So I'd take it that Derek's family doesn't know about your little unexpected surprise."_

"No, we haven't told his family yet. He wanted to wait until we knew what we were doing about the baby first."

_"Then what are you waiting for?"_

Meredith was a little annoyed by her comment. However, she kept her tone down as she answered. "I'm waiting for the signal from Derek. After all, this is his family. It wouldn't be right if I told them without him."

_"Why do I get the feeling that I'm having déjà vu?"_ There was a short pause. _"That's right. Because we had the same conversation after you told Derek about being pregnant the first time."_

"Carolyn Shepherd has plenty of grandchildren already. I don't think one more will make a difference." She immediately realized that that wasn't true. She welcomed anybody in the family because family was important to her. She then knew what she had to do. She immediately gave in. "I'll talk to Derek."

"_Good. You'll talk to McDreamy about his family and I'll talk to McSteamy about baby names. We're bound to win those arguments. After all, we're pregnant,"_ Addison replied. _"I got to_ _go_." Meredith knew by the way she had said that, she needed to go to the bathroom. _"I'll talk to you later." _

Meredith didn't have a chance to answer as she heard a click. She then jumped as she heard Derek's voice. She didn't realize that he was in the room, much alone in the house. "Hey, who were you talking to?" he asked her as he went to the fridge. He grabbed a water bottle and closed the refridgerator. He then twisted the cap and was able to open the bottle.

She turned to him as she put the phone back on the receiver. "Addison," she replied. Derek nodded as Meredith continued. He drank some water as she spoke. "I told her about the baby."

Derek gave her an angry look. "What do you mean you told her about the baby? Are you crazy?" She was surprised by his reaction. Of course she was surprised at a lot of his actions lately. "Now she's going to tell Mark and Mark is going to tell the news to my family."

Meredith looked at him, a little annoyed. "Is that really so bad? Maybe it's time they know. Everybody else knows." Derek was about to protest, but she didn't let him interrupt. "The whole hospital knows. I can tell you that. Why shouldn't they know?"

Derek gave her a look. "It's for the same reason I didn't tell them about moving here. I wanted privacy," he exclaimed. "And I didn't want them to judge me for the decisions I made that involve you. Why do you think I was annoyed when Kathleen came to visit after I arrived?"

Meredith nodded understandingly. "I'm sorry. I just thought that you would want them to know about the baby."

Derek sighed. "What are we going to tell them? We got back together just as we found out about the baby?" Meredith looked at him like she had an idea. Derek knew exactly what she was thinking. "No, we are not going to do that."

This time, Meredith gave him a look. "Well, we either tell them that or the truth. And I think I have a pretty good idea which one they will take in as good news," she replied.

"It's never going to work," Derek said.

Meredith grabbed the phone and gave it to Derek. "There's only one way to find out," she said, winking at him before leaving the room. She then went upstairs into the hall. She went past bedrooms when she suddenly stopped in front of the attic door. She didn't know why she stopped. But she felt drawn to the attic. She opened the door and it creaked opened. She slowly started walking up the squeaky stairs. She then turned on the light and looked around at the boxes that surrounded the attic.

She saw the box she was looking for and went over to it. She knelt down and opened the small box. She smiled as she came across Kylie's baby things. When she had moved out of the house in New York and moved back to Seattle, she took some of Kylie's things with her. She had wanted to keep part of her daughter with her because memories were all that she had left.

She closed the box and carried it downstairs to the hall. She was about to carry it down the second set of stairs when she ran into Derek. "Let me help you with that," he offered. He then lifted it from her hands and carried it downstairs for her. He put the box down by the living room couch. "What's in here anyway?" he asked her.

"It's Kylie's baby stuff," Meredith replied. Derek then was quiet. "I want to sort through it again."

Derek didn't say anything at first. "Are you thinking of using the stuff again?" he finally asked her.

Meredith shrugged. "Maybe. Of course we might have to get different stuff it's a boy." Derek nodded. "Did you talk to your mom or Kathleen?" she asked hesitantly. She had a feeling that he didn't. But she couldn't help asking.

Before Derek could answer, his pager went off. He groaned quietly to himself. "I got to take this. I'll see you later." He then hurried out the front door without another word.

Meredith sat down on the couch as she looked down at the box. She opened it once again and started pulling Kylie's baby things out one-by-one. It made her miss her baby even more and how she would never get to meet her baby brother or sister. And it made her think of the second baby that really didn't have a chance at life. She knew life wasn't fair. But at that moment, she wished it was, especially for her children.


	18. Chapter Seventeen

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews. And please don't forget to vote.

**Disclaimer:** Only own Kylie and the unborn babies

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen**

As the weeks passed, Derek and Meredith grew closer and closer. They bonded over the impending arrival of their baby. Derek showed up at all the doctor's appointments. He'd go to the store in the middle of the night if Meredith was dying for a craving of something that they didn't already have in the house. He would make sure that she was comfortable at all times.

Of course, so did everyone else. Meredith wasn't used to everyone fussing over her and didn't really like all the attention. It reminded her when everyone had found out that her mother was the famous Ellis Grey. They had thought she was going to get special treatment because of that. She had hated all the stares that she had gotten. Luckily, they were passed that now.

"My back is killing me," Meredith moaned as she and Christina walked through the hallways of the hospital. She was now three months along, even though it seemed like forever. She always did hate the pregnancy symptoms, especially the backaches and morning sickness.

"You are such a wimp," Christina replied, showing no sympathy for her friend.

Meredith gave her an annoyed look. "You try being pregnant," she snapped.

Christina shook her head firmly. "Nope, not me. I can't stand kids."

"Well, you're not going to be the godmother this time," Meredith replied as Christina turned to her, surprised. "I thought you could since you're my person. But I guess I'll just ask Lexie."

Christina looked at her surprised. "You want me to be the godmother? Are you crazy? If you and McDreamy die, I wouldn't know how to take care of the kid. You're better off giving the kid to Lexie," she replied. "After all, she's your sister." Meredith knew that she had a point. "Or even one of McDreamy's sisters."

"We had thought about it. But then, we changed our minds. Derek's not really that close to them any of them like I am with Lexie," Meredith replied. "I mean he does play the overprotective big brother once in awhile. But he doesn't talk to them as often as I do with Lexie."

"Of course he doesn't. You two live with each other," Christina replied.

Meredith was about to reply when Alex and George came running up to her. "Mere, who are you going to pick for godfather, me or O'Malley here?" Alex asked as he pointed to George. George gave him a look.

"Does it really matter? It's not like you are raising the kid anyway," Christina said.

Meredith ignored her as she turned back to Alex and George. They were anxiously waiting for an answer. Meredith let out of a sigh and told them the truth. "I don't know yet. Derek and I are still deciding."

"Come on. It's easy. I'm great with kids," Alex said confidently.

"Yeah, but Meredith's closer to me as a friend," George protested.

They started to argue when Meredith stopped them. "How about you two both be the baby's godfathers? Will that make you two happy?" she asked. She watched as they looked at each other before turning back to her. They nodded as they suddenly heard their pagers.

"It looks like a trauma is coming in," Alex told the group before he and Christina started to run down the hall.

Meredith was about to follow them before George stopped her. He looked at her concerned. "Maybe you should sit this one out. You look exhausted."

Meredith was about to protest when she knew he was right. She wasn't in the mood to treat patients. She was exhausted and needed to rest. She finally gave in, even though she didn't like it. "Alright, I'll be in the on call room if you need me."

* * *

Meredith lay down on the bed. She snuggled up to the covers of the blanket and closed her eyes. She was glad when she had found the room empty. It was too often that she had found Alex and Izzie or someone else with another staff member in a compromising position and she was always embarrassed afterwards. But then, she had remembered that she and Derek used to do that all the time back in the hospital in New York. And it was usually Mark or Addison who found them. They had often teased them that they were more in love than they were. Meredith used to think that was true. She wished it still was.

Her thoughts soon drifted off to her unborn baby and the future of her relationship with Derek. However, she knew that she had to stop thinking about it. The pregnancy symptoms were already keeping her up at night with the constant peeing, swelling ankles and backaches. She didn't need her worries to add onto it. So she tried to think of something else. And her thoughts ended up on Kylie. Meredith smiled to herself as her mind began to wander. It wasn't long before she was fast asleep.

She was suddenly woken up by the sound of her pager going off. She blinked as she tried to remember where she was. She then pulled out her pager from her pants pocket and squinted to see what it was. She may have been only half-awake, but she could see that her pager read 'Code Red'. She pondered for a moment, thinking of the codes and which code meant what problem. She then remembered what it meant and hurried out of the bed. She ran to the door and started to push on the handle. But it wouldn't move. She tried again but it was stuck.

She could now hear the fire alarm going off. She kept trying the door handle, but it was no use. No matter which way she tried, it still wouldn't budge. She groaned in frustration. She then banged her hands on the door and tried shouting for help. It was no use. Nobody came for her. She gave up as her back started to hurt again. She went over and sat down on the bed.

After a few minutes, she started to smell something in the air. She immediately realized that it was smoke. She got up from the bed and rushed to the door. She struggled to open the door. But all she got from trying to open it was sore hands.

She started to cough hard. It was getting more and more difficult to breathe with the smoke coming through the space underneath the door. Her eyes and nose began to burn. She knew that she had to get out of there before it was too late. She kept jiggling the door handle as she pounded on the door. But it was still jammed and there was still silence. She then realized that everyone must have been evacuated. She tried not to panic but the smoke was getting worse. She started to feel sleepy. She tried to fight the feeling. But it was too much for her and she fell to the floor, slipping into unconsciousness.


	19. Chapter Eighteen

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews. Hope you all enjoy this chapter. I have no idea what a person is like after smoke inhalation. So please forgive me if I did make a mistake. And please don't forget to vote.

**Disclaimer**: Only own Kylie and the unborn babies

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen**

Meredith slowly opened her eyes and looked around. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment so she could get used to the bright room. She saw that she was lying in a hospital bed. She was surprised when she saw Derek sleeping in a chair besides her bedside. She tried to remember what had happened, but everything was a blur. Derek then gently stirred from his sleep and looked up. She smiled at him as he gave a relieved sigh. "Thank God." Meredith was about to speak, but Derek didn't let her. "It's ok. Everything's ok. You're at Mercy West."

She tried her hardest to refresh her memory about the fire. But she still couldn't get past falling to the floor unconscious. Before she could ask what happened, the two heard a familiar voice. "How is she?" asked Lexie. Meredith and Derek turned to the doorway. She gave her sister a smile as she walked in. "Hey, you're awake." Meredith smiled in return. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine. How's the baby doing?" Meredith asked, finally speaking up. She was worried since she had breathed in a lot of smoke inhalation. At least, she assumed so. She didn't know how long she was out before someone found her.

"The baby is just fine," Lexie replied. Meredith let a relieved sigh as her sister continued. Her photographic memory was kicking in. Usually, it was annoying to Meredith. But this time, it was helpful since Derek wasn't saying much to her. He was being vague and she had no idea why. "The doctor said that you had breathed some smoke inhalation, but it wasn't as bad as they thought it was when you were brought in. So the doctor wants you to stay here overnight just for observation. But you should be able to go home tomorrow."

"How long was I out?" Meredith asked, realizing that she didn't even know what time it was.

"It wasn't very long before you were pulled out of the fire," Derek replied as Lexie gave him a look.

Meredith noticed the look. "Ok, what are you two not telling me?"

"It's nothing," Derek replied quickly as the doctor came in and the attention soon went on him. She listened as he told her the good news. She and her unborn baby were just fine. She was thrilled. She just had to come back again to make sure everything was going well. Meredith just nodded. Yet, her mind wasn't focusing on that. Instead, it was on Derek and Lexie. She knew that something was going on between her sister and ex-husband that they weren't telling her and she was determined to find out what it was.

When the doctor left, Derek went with him. He had the excuse that he wanted to tell her friends that she was awake. Meredith was left alone with Lexie, who looked nervous. "Ok, what's going on with you and Derek?" she asked her.

"What do you mean?" Lexie asked innocently, giving her sister a shrug.

Meredith wasn't falling for her sister's lies. She knew her too well. "I saw the look between you and Derek right after he said that I was pulled out of the fire," Meredith replied. "You don't give looks to each other unless there's a reason."

"I can't tell you. I'm sworn to secrecy," Lexie replied.

Meredith frowned, a little upset. "Lexie, we tell each other everything. How can you not me this?"

Lexie didn't have a chance to answer as Meredith was suddenly ambushed by her friends, who had come in to visit. As Meredith exchanged greetings with her friends, she noticed that Lexie slipped out of the room. She would just have to wait to talk to her.

The next day, she was able to go home. Over the next few days, she rested at home. She had found out that the fire had been caused by some faulty wiring. Luckily, there was only one section that was severely damaged. However, Meredith wasn't allowed to go back to the hospital for awhile because of the smoke. Luckily, Derek took some time off so he could keep an eye on her and make sure nothing happens to her or the baby. She was grateful since she had a couple of nightmares about the fire. She would wake up in the middle of the night, screaming because the flames got too close. Derek came in her room and comforted her as she tried to forget the nightmare. He would stay with her until she calmed down and went back to sleep.

One night, the two settled down on the couch together and decided to discuss names. Lexie was at work. So it was just the two of them. Derek and Meredith didn't want to know the sex, but they still wanted to have a name prepared for either one. "I'd never thought we would be doing this again," Derek told her.

Meredith immediately knew what he meant. "Me either," she agreed. "It's a little weird, isn't it?"

Derek nodded as he looked down at his list of names. "So what are we going to use for our son's first name?" he asked.

"You still want Christopher as his middle name after all these years?" Meredith asked him. He had wanted to carry on his middle name to his son. However, that never happened since they had a daughter instead. And they never had a chance to know their second baby.

Derek gave her a smile. "Yeah, it's my dream to have a son so I could carry on the Shepherd name," he replied.

"Maybe you'll get your wish," Meredith said as she returned the smile. She then looked at her list. "What about Jacob?"

Derek made a face. "No, it's too popular."

"What about Matthew?" Meredith asked him as she continued to look at her list. She hadn't realized that her list had so many names that were popular lately until now.

Derek shook his head. "I think Mark and Addison are considering that name for their baby if it's a boy."

"That's not fair for Addison," Meredith replied before she had a thought. "Of course, she do wants to continue the A tradition. So I'm not sure how they are going to do that. But I'm sure they will figure it out." She stared at her list as her mind started to wander back to the fire. She had been trying to ask Lexie about it. But she could never get an answer out of her. Instead, she just ignored the question. When her friends came to visit, they did the same thing. Everyone knew the truth. But they didn't want to say anything. "Who pulled me out of the fire?" she asked him. Before he could give her an excuse, she continued as she stood up from the couch. "Don't even give me that crap. I know there's some big secret that you two have been hiding. And I have a feeling that everyone else knows too. What do they know that I don't?" Meredith exclaimed.

Derek stood up as well. He looked deep in her eyes as he gave her a smile. "I did."

Meredith was just stunned. "You're the one who rescued me?" she asked. It all made sense now. But she was still surprised by it. "You actually went into the fire to save me?" She couldn't believe it.

Derek nodded. "I lost you once. I wasn't going to lose you again."

Meredith didn't say anything at first. She was still processing the information that he just given her. He went into the fire to _save _her, even though he could have been hurt or even killed. He risked his life for her and she couldn't have been more grateful. "Thank you. Thank you so much," she said as she embraced him in a hug. "God, I felt so scared," she said in a whisper. She could feel tears starting to form in her eyes.

"I know," Derek said as he tried to comfort her. "It's ok. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

Meredith pulled away for a second. "I know you won't. And I won't either. I want my McDreamy here with me to help raise our child." She wondered if Derek listened to her words carefully.

Derek turned to her, realizing what she just said. "Meredith, did you say what I thought you just said? Did you say 'McDreamy'?" He could have sworn it was her old nickname for him.

Meredith just smiled. "What else I'd call you?" Derek smiled in return, knowing that he had proven himself to her. They were finallly in a relationship again. They then leaned in for a passionate kiss. Their lips soon touched and the kiss lasted for many seconds. They finally pulled away as they gasped for air. "We should get back to work."

They then looked at each other. Somehow, they both knew what they were thinking. "We still have six more months to decide," Derek said. Meredith knew he had a point. "Come on. Let's go have some fun before Lexie gets home." She gave him a smile as he led her towards the stairs and to her bedroom.


	20. Chapter Nineteen

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews. I'd hate to say it but there are only a few more chapters left of this story.

**Disclaimer**: Only own the children

* * *

**Chapter Nineteen**

Meredith was resting on the couch in the middle of the afternoon when she heard the phone ringing. She reached over the armchair of the couch and grabbed the phone. She put it to her ear before she spoke. "Hello?"

_"Hey, Big Grey,"_ said a familiar voice. Meredith immediately knew it was Mark. _"Derek told me about the fire. Are you ok? Addison's pretty worried about you."_

"Well, tell her that I'm fine. And all that stress isn't good for the baby," Meredith replied.

_"Oh, she really doesn't need to worry about that anymore."_ Meredith didn't have a chance to ask as he answered for her. "She had the baby just a few minutes ago." Meredith couldn't help but smile at the announcement. _"Addison and I are parents to a beautiful healthy baby girl."_

"Congratulations. What's her name?" Meredith asked. She had a feeling that it either started with an 'A' or 'M' since Mark and Addison had been arguing about that for months.

There was a little bit of silence on the other end._ "Actually, we decided not to go with our original plan. Instead, we went with a unique name. We're naming her Emerson Faith Sloan."_

Meredith was surprised. "I can't argue with you there. It's definitely unique. What made you change your mind?"

_"It's a long story. I don't want to get into it."_ He quickly changed the subject. _"Is Derek giving you any more trouble? Because I'll gladly beat him up for you if he is."_

Meredith laughed as the front door opened. Derek had come back from his shift. "Hold on for a moment." She then got up from the couch and walked through the room over to the front hall. "It's Mark. Addison had the baby. And I think you should be the one who tell him our good news."

Derek smiled as she handed him the phone. They then exchanged a quick kiss before he put the phone to his ear and started talking to Mark. She anxiously waited for Derek to tell Mark about them. When he did, she could hear Mark laughing on the other end. She couldn't help but smile. She knew that he wouldn't believe him. She then could have sworn she heard Mark say, _"It's about time."_

Meredith couldn't help but laugh before she started to leave Derek to explain the story. She went upstairs and into the room that they were going to use for the nursery. They had already started preparing the room shortly after they had found out they were pregnant again. They had been so excited that they couldn't wait to get started.

Unlike Kylie's pink nursery, this one was set up with neutral colors since so far, they had decided not to find out the baby's sex. However, she had a feeling that it might change since Derek was dying to know if he was finally going to have a son or not. She didn't tell Derek, but she had a slight feeling it might be. This pregnancy was feeling so much different than it was when she was pregnant with Kylie.

She walked into the room and over to the rocking chair that was next to the crib. She sat down in the chair and started rocking in it. It was the same rocking chair that they had in Kylie's nursery. It had been a gift from Derek to Meredith shortly after she had found out she was pregnant. She loved it and kept it even after Kylie's death. It was her way of keeping those precious memories of those happy times with Kylie with her.

"I thought I would find you in here," said a familiar voice. She turned to see Derek leaning against the doorframe. He was smiling away. "Well, Mark and Addison are thrilled to have their new daughter. And they are going to name us godparents, just like they were to Kylie."

"What did you tell them?" Meredith asked as she got up from the chair. She had a feeling that she already knew the answer.

"I told them that we'd be honored to be godparents to Emerson Faith Sloan," Derek replied. He then chuckled in amusement. "I never would have thought that they would name her Emerson. But it's a beautiful name." Meredith couldn't argue with that. "Too bad we don't have a name for our child. My mother's dying to know what's her next grandchild's name will be."

Derek had finally told his family about the pregnancy after a lot of encouraging from Meredith, Mark and Addison. Everyone in his family had been shocked about it at first. It only took a few seconds for them to recover before they started asking him questions. Carolyn Shepherd had been pleased when she had found out that Derek and Meredith were keeping the baby. However, she wasn't happy when she had discovered that they weren't going to get married. Her mind was then set at ease once Derek had called again with the news that they had gotten back together.

"We still have plenty of time to figure it out," Meredith said, even if they continued to wait until the delivery to know whether it was a boy or a girl. "In the meantime, we can have fun playing around with names." Derek couldn't argue with that. He leaned closer to her and they shared a passionate kiss.

"Now how about we celebrate our new goddaughter by me taking you out to a late dinner tonight?" Derek asked. He almost suggested Joe's before he remembered that she was pregnant.

"It sounds perfect," Meredith replied.

* * *

"So where is Derek taking you tonight?" Lexie asked Meredith as she helped her big sister get ready for another date with Derek. It had been a month since they had gotten back together again. And both of them couldn't have been happier.

"He won't tell me. He wants to leave that as a surprise," Meredith replied as she admired herself in the mirror. She then looked down at her small baby bump. "I just hope that we're not going too fast. After all, we just got back together."

Lexie gave her a look. "You mean like the first time? You two got married so fast that it was almost like you guys eloped," she said with a smile. "But I could see that you were happy with him. So I couldn't complain. And now, it seems like you are back to your old self again. You're happy."

Meredith smiled in return. "I am."

"You should be. You deserve it. You both do," Lexie replied as they heard a knock at the door. "I'll get that." She walked over and pulled the bedroom door open. Neither of the sisters was surprised when they saw Derek standing there.

Derek couldn't keep his eyes off of Meredith. He gave her a wide smile. "Wow, you look so beautiful."

Meredith blushed as she gave him a smile in return. "Thank you." She couldn't help noticing how handsome he looked in his tuxedo and black bow tie.

"Shall we get going?" Derek asked her. She nodded and he led her out of the bedroom. "Bye Lexie," he called, finally acknowledging her. Meredith giggled as they walked downstairs. "I hope you're ready for my night of surprises," he told her as they walked out onto the front porch.

"I can't wait," Meredith replied as they arrived at his car. He opened the front passenger door for her and she slid into the seat. She waited patiently as he shut her car door and walked over to the driver's side of the car. He then slid in before she started the conversation. "So where are you taking me?"

"You'll have to wait and see when we get there," Derek replied as he gave her a wink. He then changed the subject. She then knew that he wouldn't tell her anymore. So she just let it go. She just had to wait and see what Derek had planned.

She started to notice that he was driving them towards the hospital. "Derek, where are we going?" she asked confused. He didn't answer. Instead, he just gave her a smile. She was surprised when he parked in front of Joe's. "What are we doing here?" she asked. "You know I can't drink."

"Stop asking questions and follow me," Derek replied as he got out. She was still baffled, but she opened her car door and started to get out. By then, he arrived to the other side of the car and helped her out. "There you go. This way, my lady," he said as he took her hand. He led her inside.

She gasped in shock and surprise as her friends and Derek's family jumped out of their hiding places. Meredith saw that Lexie somehow managed to beat them there. Even Mark and Addison were there with baby Emerson. As everyone came over with hugs and kisses, she could see that the whole place was decorated with streamers and balloons. "What's going on?" she asked still completely lost.

Derek spoke up. "Well, this used to be the date of our wedding anniversary. But now, it's the date of our new beginning, for us and for our baby." He then bent down on one knee as Meredith gasped. "This has been one crazy year for us. But I've never given up that we would be together again, even after you said that you wanted to wait until you could trust me again. I hope it was worth the wait because I'm ready to start a new beginning. So I'm asking you in front of our family and friends to marry me all over again. Will you be my wife again?" he said with a smile as he pulled out the same engagement ring he had proposed to her with before.

Meredith was speechless. She looked around all of the eager faces waiting for her answer. She took a deep breath before answering. "Yes, I will marry you again," she replied, returning the smile. There were applause and cheers from the crowd as Derek slipped the ring on her finger. He then got up as the crowd continued to clap. For a few moments, they didn't even notice as they shared a passionate kiss.

"Drinks are on the house," Joe called, making Derek and Meredith reluctantly pull away. The party then got started. The chairs and tables had been pulled away to make room for dancing. There was food and refreshments on a table at the far corner of the room. Meredith wanted to get some food. However, Derek immediately pulled her to the dance floor for the first dance.

"How did you manage to pull this off?" Meredith asked Derek amazed.

"Well, I had tons of help from your friends," Derek replied as he gestured to Alex, Izzie and Christina, who were huddled in a corner together. "It seems that they wanted us to get back together almost as much as I did."

Meredith laughed at that comment. "I have a feeling that they weren't the only ones."

Eventually, Meredith had to take a break. She excused herself and went to sit over by Addison, who was holding a sleeping Emerson. Meredith couldn't help but gush over the adorable baby. "Do you want to hold her?" Addison asked. She didn't let her best friend answer. Instead, she just gently handed her over to her.

"Addison, she's beautiful," Meredith said with a smile as she looked down at her goddaughter.

Addison smiled in return. "Thank you. And it won't be long before you and Derek have a little one running around too." Meredith nodded, but didn't answer her. Addison immediately knew what she was thinking. "Kylie's here in spirit."

Meredith nodded sadly. "I know."

Derek then came over to the two. "Alright, it's time for Uncle Derek to hold her," he said as he gently picked Emerson up from Meredith's arms.

"Funny, I thought you were talking about your fiancée," Meredith said as they exchanged a loving kiss. She then got up from her chair and gasped. "Derek, put your hand here," she said as she took his hand. She placed it on her stomach where she had felt the kick. "The baby kicked."

The baby kicked again as Derek chuckled. "It sure did." They smiled at each other as Emerson started to fuss. Derek then handed Emerson back to her mother before leading Meredith onto the dance floor again. "Make it a slow song," Derek requested to George, who was handing the music. George nodded.

Derek and Meredith then started to sway to the music. "Are there any other surprises I should expect tonight?" she asked him.

Derek shrugged. "I may have one more up my sleeve." He then pulled out an small envelope from his pocket.

Meredith frowned. "What's this?" she asked.

"Well, the doctor's appointment was today. And I may have asked your doctor to write down our baby's sex and put it in an envelope just in case we wanted to know before the delivery," Derek replied.

Meredith gave him a look. "Derek Shepherd, we agreed that we were willing to wait."

Derek nodded. "Yeah, but I really want to know if we're going to have a son. But if you don't want to know, then I will wait."

"Are you sure?" Meredith asked him.

Derek nodded. "Yes, but you're going to have to hide the envelope from me. Otherwise, I might take a little peek."

Meredith giggled. "Yeah, I know you will. Don't worry. I'll find the perfect place to hide it." There was a short pause. "Of course, there's no reason why I can't see what it is," she teased him.

Derek pretended to look hurt. "That's not fair."

"You're right. If we feel like opening it, we should do it together," Meredith replied. Derek nodded before she continued. "And I have to say that this pregnancy feels so different from Kylie's. So I'm thinking that it is a boy this time."

Derek gave her a smile. "I can't wait to find out. Of course, it doesn't matter whether it's a boy or a girl. All that matters is that you and the baby are healthy."

"That's the one thing you don't have to worry about," Meredith replied as she admired her engagement ring.

"I could get you a new one, you know," Derek said, noticing the faraway look.

Meredith shook her head as she turned to him. "No, it's may be my old one but it shows that you are still the guy for me and always will be." Derek couldn't help but smile back at her.


	21. Chapter Twenty

**A/N**: I apologize for the long delay. Thank you for the awesome reviews. And last chance to vote. McBaby will finally be born in the next chapter!

**Disclaimer**: Only own the children

* * *

**Chapter Twenty**

Meredith was reading a book when she heard the front door open. She got up to see who it was and walked into the foyer. She gave a wide smile to Derek as he walked through the front door. He smiled in return as he went over and gave his fiancée a passionate kiss. "How was your day?" he asked her.

Meredith frowned. "It was so boring. I can't believe that the Chief won't let me go back to work. The fire was weeks ago. Even the doctor says that it would be fine for me to go back to work. Why can't I?"

"It's because you are less than a month away from delivering our child. And you know how much our jobs can cause stress. I don't want anything to happen to you or our baby." He could tell that she was still unhappy about it. "Well, look at the bright side. In a few days, you'll be going back to the hospital. You can see everybody then."

Meredith knew he had a point. "Yeah, but I'm not going to be working. I'll be at my baby shower. I told Lexie that she don't have to do it because it is my second child. And I'm close to my due date," she told him. "But she really wanted to do it for me. So I'm going to let her because I'm a great big sister."

Derek gave her a reassuring smile. "I'm sure it will be fun. And speaking of our baby, I have the perfect name for our son."

Meredith gave him a look. "You didn't sneak a peek at the envelope, did you?"

"How could I when you hid the envelope from me?" Derek reminded her. Meredith hid that envelope well. She knew Derek wouldn't find it without her help. "I just meant that if we do have a son, I have the perfect name for him."

"Really? What is it?" Meredith asked curious to hear what name he had come up with.

"Well, I thought a lot about it and I talked to Mark and Addison. And they don't mind if we use Matthew as his name. So I believe that our son's name should be Matthew Christopher Shepherd," Derek replied.

Meredith nodded. "I see. But are you sure you don't mind me and your son having M names?"

Derek shook his head. "No, I don't."

Meredith didn't bug him about it any longer. "Ok, but what if it is a girl?" she teased him.

Derek shrugged. "Then you can pick out the name."

"So that's our deal, huh?" Meredith asked him as she gave him another smile. "I'll take it. Just don't complain if you don't like the name."

"I won't. I promise," Derek replied as he returned her smile.

* * *

Derek helped Meredith out of the car and across the parking lot. She didn't dare tell him that she could walk by herself and didn't need any help. But he seemed so determined to make sure she got to her destination safely that she didn't want to interrupt that. They arrived at the lobby where their friends were just starting their rounds. They greeted the two as they walked over to them. The concerned questions came and Derek immediately stopped them. "You'll have plenty of time to talk to her later at the shower. Right now, I think we all have rounds."

"O'Malley and I won't get a chance to see her," Alex pointed out.

"I'll stop by and try to find you after the baby shower is over," Meredith replied, cheering them up. "I'm going to go to the bathroom." She excused herself and hurried into the nearest bathroom.

After a few minutes, she walked out of the stall and went over one of the sinks. She turned on the water and applied the soap on her hands. She then scrubbed her hands together as she placed them under the water. She then grabbed a towel from the dispenser and dried her hands off. She heard footsteps and turned to see who had come in. She wasn't surprised when she saw that it was Lexie. "Hey, I heard you were here," she told her sister.

"Well, I was dying to get out of the house," Meredith replied. "And I couldn't miss the baby shower you're throwing for me."

"Well, I didn't get to the first time. Addison and Kathleen were the hostesses. I was just a guest." Meredith knew she had a point. "But I could still cancel it if you don't want to have one. I'd understand."

"No, it's fine. I just have a lot on my mind with the baby," Meredith replied. "Then we're going back to New York for Emerson's baptism after that. And we have the wedding to plan for. So this is the perfect distraction to get me away all that for a couple of hours."

"Are you sure?" Lexie asked one final time. Meredith nodded. She didn't realize that she had so much on her mind until she actually had a chance to think about. Lexie was satisfied by her answer. She didn't ask her any more questions as they left the bathroom. They walked over to the elevators and pressed the up button. They patiently waited for their turn before they walked into the elevator. After they reached the floor they needed, Lexie led her to the room that they were going to have the baby shower. Most of the decorations were already up. So was the food and drinks. To Meredith's surprise, the gifts were even already on one of the tables. "Everyone came really early to set up the room and put the gifts on the table. Apparently, they are just as excited as I am for the baby to get here. Any hint for the excited aunt?" Lexie asked her.

Meredith gave her a smile. "Sorry, I don't even know." Lexie tried not to show her disappointment as they walked over to the table with the gifts. "I don't want to know. And Derek told me that he is willing to wait. After all, you only get some of those special surprises in life." Lexie couldn't help but agree. The two sisters didn't have a chance to say anything else as their guests started to arrive.

Meredith had to admit that she did have fun. She enjoyed talking to her friends and opening her gifts. Most of her friends bought both boy and girl gifts. She even enjoyed the games that they had played. She wished that the day didn't end. However, time flew by and soon, she was saying good-bye to her friends as they left the room. It wasn't long before it was just her and Lexie, Izzie, Callie, Arizona Christina.

"You go ahead. We'll clean up," Izzie told Meredith as she and Lexie started to pick up the trash.

"Yeah, I'll come with you," Christina offered.

Everyone knew the real reason she was coming along with Meredith. Izzie stopped her even before she walked out of the door. "Hey, you didn't help us set up. The least you could do is clean up," she protested.

Christina looked at Meredith for help. Meredith gave her a look. "Don't drag me in this. I'm just the guest of honor. And quit fussing over me."

"Are they bothering you again?" asked a familiar voice. The doctors turned to see Derek standing in the doorway. "Am I allowed to come in now or do I have to wait?" He didn't let anybody answer. Instead, he went over to the table where Meredith had spread out the gifts. "Wow, that's a lot of presents. I'm sure our son or daughter will love them." Meredith had to agree. "So are you ready to go?" he asked her.

"Don't worry about the gifts. I'll bring them back with me after Joe's," Lexie told them with a smile. "You two just go have fun."

Derek and Meredith both returned that smile. "Thanks Lexie. I think we will," Derek said as he took Meredith's hand. They said good-bye to the group and went into the hallway. He then led her towards the stairs when she pulled him into the opposite direction towards the elevators. Derek just smiled at her as she brought him to the elevator. He then pressed the down button and the elevator dinged. The doors opened and Meredith went in with Derek right behind her. "So what is your plan tonight?" he asked her as the doors closed. Meredith was about to answer when they felt the elevator jerk. It then stopped and Derek groaned. "Damn it. I thought they got the elevator fixed. Don't worry. I'm sure they will fix it soon. If not, I'm sure we'll find something to entertain ourselves."

Meredith wasn't listening. Instead, she was focused on the gushing sound she had heard that came out of her lower abdomen. She immediately realized what had happened. "Derek, I'm afriad we can't do that."

"Why not?" he asked as he turned to her.

"My water just broke," she replied as she gestured to the water underneath her feet.


	22. Chapter Twenty One

**A/N**: Ok, it was a tie for the vote. So it was up to me to break it. Hope you're all fine with what I have picked. And thank you for the awesome reviews. I'm going on vacation in a couple of days for two weeks. And there won't be much internet. So I'll send the final couple chapters when I can.

**Disclaimer**: Only own the Shepherd children

* * *

**Chapter Twenty One**

Meredith sat on the floor and leaned back against the wall of the elevator as a contraction came. She squeezed Derek's hand tightly until it finally passed. Meredith then breathed a sigh of relief. "Good girl," Derek told her. "You're doing great."

"How long will it be before they fix the elevator?" Meredith asked him. They had been in there for an hour. Her contractions were getting closer and closer together now. They were now five minutes apart. However, it was lasting longer than just thirty seconds. It was more like a minute. But it seemed longer.

Derek shrugged. "I don't know. They are working on it as fast as they can. Just hold on," he told her. He hated to see her in pain, even if it was for labor.

"I'm trying. But I have a feeling that our son or daughter wants to be born in the elevator," Meredith moaned.

"Everything's going to be fine. Just breathe," Derek said as Meredith took deep breaths. "If the baby wants to be born in the elevator, then I'm going to deliver him or her alone."

"Derek, you may be an excellent surgeon, but you don't know how to deliver babies," Meredith said gently. She didn't want to hurt his feelings. But she'd rather leave the actual delivery to a baby doctor.

"Hey, do you trust me?" Derek asked her.

Meredith gave him a smile. "Yes, I do." She didn't have a chance to say anything more as another contraction came along. "That's now three minutes," she said through gritted teeth.

Derek then knew that the baby wasn't going to wait. "You're right. There's no waiting for the workers to fix the elevator. Our baby is coming now," he replied. A few minutes later, Meredith was pushing as hard as she could. Derek checked her and gave her a smile. "Just one more big push and our baby should be out."

"I can't, Derek," she moaned. She was exhausted and felt like she couldn't push anymore.

"Yes, you can. You can do this, Meredith. I know you can," Derek said, encouraging her as he locked eyes with her. He believed in her and wasn't going to let her give him. That gave her the strength for one more push. Meredith then nodded and pushed again. She suddenly felt relief as she heard a small cry.

"We did it," Meredith said happily as tears ran down her face. Derek wrapped their baby in Meredith's doctor coat as the elevator doors started moving again. Derek and Meredith couldn't stop looking at their baby as the elevator reached the floor. They turned to see Dr. Webber, Dr. Bailey and Lexie. However, they could see that there were more people behind them. But they couldn't tell who they were.

"Are you two alright?" Dr. Webber asked them.

Derek and Meredith turned to each other and exchanged wide smiles. "Yeah, we're just fine," Derek replied, still looking at his fiancée.

It wasn't long before Meredith was admitted in a room and she was holding their baby in her arms. Derek was sitting beside her in one of the hard chairs while he watched Meredith talk to their son.

Just then, they heard a knock at the door. They turned to see Lexie standing in the doorway. "Are you up for a visitor?" she asked eagerly.

Meredith nodded. "Sure. Come on in," she replied as she gave her sister a smile. Lexie walked in and went over to her bedside. She smiled as Meredith made the announcement. "I'd like you to meet your nephew, Matthew Christopher Shepherd," she told her proudly. Derek couldn't help but smile proudly as well.

Lexie looked down at a sleeping Matthew. "He's so handsome," she said as Meredith gently handed him over to her. "Well, it looks like we'll have to get rid of the pink stuff and make way for the blue."

"I told you I was right. But nobody ever listens to me," Derek said as Meredith gave him a look.

"Well, it's a good thing it is a boy. Otherwise, you would have had a baby daughter with no name," Lexie replied. "Or did you have a name if it was a girl?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, we tossed around some names. But we didn't have a name ready like we had with Matthew."

"I like that name. And I'm not just saying that because he's my nephew," Lexie replied as she handed him back to his mother. "I think I'd better get out of here before I get in trouble for visiting after hours. I'll see you guys in the morning."

"Bye Lexie," Derek replied as she started walking out of the room. Meredith and Lexie exchanged good-byes before Lexie left. Derek then turned back to Meredith and gave her a smile. "I should probably be going too. Let you and our son get some rest." Meredith nodded as he gave her a kiss on her forehead. "I love you."

"I love you too," Meredith replied before he gently kissed Matthew. He started to leave when she stopped him. He stood in the doorway, waiting to hear what she had to say. "Derek, do you remember when you told me that you had no doubts that we would be together again, even after I told you to wait?" Derek nodded. "Well, I did have doubts, even after I found out I was pregnant. Then one day, I heard Kylie's voice whispering inside of me. And she told me that everything would work out fine, even with you. Is that crazy to believe?"

Derek shook his head. "I'd say Kylie wanted to make sure her parents get back together again. After all, she did hate to see us fight."

Meredith knew that was true. However, she had a different theory. "I think she was there to remind me that I knew all along that we would get back together. I just didn't want to admit it."

"You do seem to do that a lot lately," Derek teased her. "I hope it won't be a habit anymore."

Meredith gave him a smile. "No, it won't be. Good night, Derek. I love you."

"Good night. I love you both," Derek replied before he disappeared out of the room.


	23. Chapter Twenty Two

**A/N**: Thank you for the awesome reviews. I apologize for the very long delay. This is the final chapter besides the epilogue. I like to thank all the reviews, story and favorite alerts. I have to admit that this one has been one of my favorite Meredith/McDreamy stories to write.

**Disclaimer**: Only own the Shepherd children

* * *

**Chapter Twenty Two**

A few months later, it was the day that Derek and Meredith had been waiting for. They finally were getting remarried and they couldn't have been more excited. It was going to be a small wedding with only family and friends present.

Most of Derek's family was able to come. They had been thrilled when they had found out that Meredith delivered Matthew safely, even if it was in an elevator. They had fallen in love with him the minute they laid eyes on him.

The wedding rehearsal had gone well. It had reminded Meredith of their first wedding, quick and simple. It had made Meredith and Derek both anxious for the next day when they would get to say 'I do' again.

That morning, Meredith woke up with butterflies in her stomach. It wouldn't go away as she ate her breakfast with Addison, Lexie, Christina and Izzie, her matron-of-honor and bridesmaids. Sitting at the table was also little Emerson. Derek, Mark, George, Alex and Dr. Webber were all at Alex's house getting ready. So was little Matthew.

"God, I'm so nervous that I can't eat," Meredith moaned.

"You have to eat something. You can't get married on an empty stomach," Izzie told her.

"I know. But I don't think I can," Meredith replied as she started pacing. "I mean I'm getting remarried to my ex-husband. How crazy is that?"

"It's crazy," Christina replied as the others gave her a look. "Hey, she asked."

"It may be uncommon, but it does happen to a few lucky couples," Lexie informed them. "And you and Derek are one of those lucky couples."

"Are we?" Meredith asked. "I mean are we really doing the right thing?"

"Of course you are. Why would you think otherwise?" Addison asked. "Is it because of Matthew?" Before Meredith could reply, her best friend continued. "Because you should stop thinking like that. You know it's not true."

Meredith did know that it was true. But she still had doubts. She knew she needed a distraction. "I'm going to go take a shower. Derek's mom should be here around nine. So someone will need to let her in."

"No problem," Lexie replied.

A few hours later, Meredith had taken a hot shower and was now getting ready for the wedding. She wished that she could fit in her first wedding dress. But she knew she couldn't since she knew that her body wouldn't ever be the same after having Kylie and now Matthew.

She had still kept her first wedding dress even after the divorce. She didn't know why. But she guessed it was because it reminded her of how happy she and Derek were before the car accident happened.

Meredith put on her new wedding dress before she went to the mirror. She admired herself as she looked at the beautiful white dress that she was wearing. She still couldn't believe that she was getting remarried to her ex-husband. It didn't seem possible. Even though she still wasn't sure she was doing the right thing, it felt right.

She then heard a knock at the door and she told the person to come in. Addison walked in and looked at Meredith. "Wow, you look perfect," she replied as she gave her best friend a smile.

"Thanks," Meredith replied as she smiled in return. She sighed. "This is it, isn't it? I'm really getting married to Derek again."

Addison nodded. "I had no doubts that you and Derek would be together again, even with your stubbornness."

Meredith gave her a look. "I am not stubborn."

"You are stubborn. Otherwise, it wouldn't have taken as long as it did for you to admit your feelings to Derek. And I know you were afraid of getting hurt again. But part of it had to do with you being too stubborn."

Meredith just shook her head in amusement. "I suppose so."

"I know so. I just hope that your son doesn't inherit his mother's stubbornness like Kylie did."

Meredith gave her a small smile. "I miss her."

"I know you do. I do too. But she's still here with us." Meredith nodded. "She would have been thrilled to find out that Mommy and Daddy were getting remarried."

Meredith smiled wider when she heard that. "Yeah, she would have loved it."

Lexie knocked on the door. "Hey, what's taking so long? We have to get going." She then stopped and noticed her sister. "Wow, you look so beautiful."

"Thanks," Meredith replied, giving her sister a smile. She then looked at the time. "She's right. We should. I don't want to be late for my own wedding, even if it's my second wedding." She followed Lexie and Addison out of her bedroom.

* * *

Meredith watched and waited anxiously until it was her turn to walk down the aisle with Matthew in her arms. Mark was by her side. Even though he was Derek's best man, he had offered to give Meredith away. She had graciously accepted.

Finally, the wedding music started and Meredith linked her right arm through Mark's arm. As Meredith walked down the aisle, she looked at all the smiling faces before she turned to Derek. He was smiling away.

The three then reached the front of the aisle and Meredith handed Matthew to Derek's mother before walking over to Derek and the reverend. Neither Derek nor Meredith paid attention as the reverend welcomed everyone. Instead, they gazed into each other's eyes.

However, they both snapped out of their daydreams as Meredith was asked to say her vows. "We were once in love. I never thought we could be again, at least not with each other. When you came to Seattle, I was angry and upset. I didn't want anything to do with you. But as we spent time together, I realized that my love for you never went away. And it scared me. I didn't want to get hurt again. Yet, you proved that your love for me and our baby was stronger than ever. That's when I knew that we deserved a second chance together. Derek, I love you with all my heart."

Derek then spoke. "Meredith, we both know that our life together hadn't been easy. We had our good days and bad days. And that doesn't mean there still won't be tough roads ahead of us, especially now that we have Matthew. But I promise that I will be right by your side all the way. We've been given this second chance. And I'm not going to blow it. Meredith, I love you with all my heart."

"May I have the rings?" the reverend asked.

Addison handed Meredith the ring. "This ring symbolizes my love and commitment to you for now and for always," Meredith said as she slipped the ring on Derek.

Mark then handed Derek his ring. "This ring symbolizes my love and commitment to you for now and for always," Derek replied as he slipped the ring on Meredith's finger. She was surprised that it fit perfectly.

After a few more minutes, Derek and Meredith heard the words that they had been waiting for. "By the power invested in me, I pronounce you once again husband and wife. Dr. Shepherd, you may kiss your bride."

Derek and Meredith leaned in for a passionate kiss. Everyone applauded and cheered as they stood up. Derek and Meredith finally pulled away, smiling wide for the crowd. "I'm proud to present Dr. Shepherd and Dr. Grey-Shepherd again." Derek and Meredith both knew at that moment that it was they were husband and wife again, as it should be. The only difference was that they had Matthew.

Meredith and Derek exchanged smiles. They both knew that their life wouldn't be the same back before the divorce and Kylie's death. However, they knew they could start a new life with Matthew. And they couldn't wait to get started. The best part was that Meredith knew that they were going to stick together this time, for better or for worse.


	24. Epilogue

**A/N**: Final chapter! I thank all my readers and reviews! You rock!

**A/N**: More Meredith/McDreamy stories are on the way. And I'm going to try my hand at an Addison/McSteamy romance story as well. So look out for them soon.

**Disclaimer**: Only own the Shepherd children

* * *

_Seattle_

_Twenty Five Years Later_

Meredith squeezed Derek's hand as they anxiously waited to hear the news. Across the room were Mark and Addison, who were also anxiously waiting. It seemed like forever since they had arrived at the hospital once they heard that Emerson was in labor.

"I should be in there," Addison exclaimed. "I am a doctor, not to mention her mother."

"But you're not her doctor," Mark said gently. He hated to see his wife like this. But there was nothing she could do except wait.

"I'm sure she's fine. After all, she has Matt in there with her," Derek pointed out. "He may not be a doctor, but he is the father."

Ever since they had been little, Matthew and Emerson had been best friends. After Matthew was born, Derek and Meredith had started to visit New York City more often. It didn't take long for Matt and Emerson to become friends. As the years went by, the friendship had blossomed into romance. They started to do the long-distance relationship until they had entered college. Then Emerson had moved to Seattle to be closer to Matt. Derek and Meredith had kept a close eye on her for Addison and Mark. After years of being together, Matt and Emerson had finally married. Soon, they found out that they were pregnant.

Meredith took another deep sigh as she saw her son coming through the doors. She nudged Derek and they got up from their chairs. Addison and Mark were right behind them. All four could see Matt smiling away. They couldn't wait to hear what the baby was. "You have a granddaughter," he announced proudly. "It's a girl."

Everyone cheered. Derek and Meredith embraced each other in a hug. They couldn't believe that they had a granddaughter. They could see that Mark and Addison were just as proud and pleased as they were.

"How's Emerson?" Addison asked anxiously.

"She's just fine. She did great," Matt replied told them. He then turned to his mother-in-law. "I can see why you love doing this job."

"How's the baby?" Meredith asked him. "What's her name?" She couldn't help but ask that, considering Matt and Emerson hadn't had a name ready for their baby.

"She's perfectly healthy. She was seven pounds, five ounces. But Emerson and I want to tell you together what her name is," Matt replied. Meredith was disappointed, but she understood.

It wasn't long before the grandparents were shown into Emerson's private room. They couldn't help but gush over the tiny bundle of joy in Emerson's arms. "She's so beautiful," Addison told her. "I think she has your eyes."

"What's her name?" Meredith repeated.

Matt and Emerson looked at each other. Emerson gestured Matt to say it. Matt turned to his parents. "Well, we had a lot of discussion over that. And we have decided that if you guys don't mind, we are going to name her after her aunt," Matt told them.

"We're going to use her middle name as her middle name," Emerson explained.

"So her name is Zoe Joy Shepherd," Matt told them proudly.

"Really?" Meredith asked him surprised. Matt nodded. Meredith and Derek exchanged looks before smiling. "We love that you want to honor your sister's memory like that."

"Do you want to hold her, Dad?" Emerson asked as she gently handed Zoe to Mark. Everyone got a turn in holding the new baby. Meredith patiently waited for her turn. However, it seemed like forever before Derek finally put her granddaughter in her arms.

Meredith couldn't help but smile down at the precious sight before her. Even though she was sleeping, she started talking to her anyway. "You have a big name to live up to, you know. But don't worry. Your Grandpa Derek and I will help you with telling you all about your Aunt Kylie. I know you'll be just as sweet and adorable she was, maybe even more."

"And we're going to spoil you to death," Derek added. Meredith couldn't help but giggle at that statement.

* * *

After a few hours, Derek and Meredith finally arrived back at their house. They were exhausted but happy that the delivery went well. They cuddled up together on the couch after Meredith pulled out the old photo albums of both Kylie and Matt.

"Can you believe we're grandparents?" she asked as she looked through the baby pictures of Matt. "It seems like yesterday we were sending Matt off to his first day of kindergarten. Where did the time go?"

Derek shrugged. "I don't know." He then looked at Meredith. "Are you sure you don't mind Zoe having Kylie's middle name?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah, I think it's really sweet of him to want to honor his sister even though he has never met her." She then had a thought. "You know, I didn't realize until now that this day is the day we lost Kylie."

Derek quickly realized she was right. "Wow, I was so busy thinking of Matt and Emerson that I didn't even think about it."

Meredith nodded. "I think this calls for a little celebration." She got up from the couch and disappeared in the other room. She soon came back with two wine glasses and a bottle of wine. She poured a little bit in each glass. She then handed one glass to Derek and kept the other one to herself. "To Kylie, the daughter we lost," Meredith said raising her glass.

"And to Zoe, our new granddaughter," Derek added as he raised his glass. They clicked them together and then each took a sip from their glass. After drinking their wine, they put their glasses on the table. Meredith then cuddled up to Derek once again and he wrapped his arms around her. They both just laid there on the couch, thinking of little Zoe.

Meredith knew that neither she nor Derek would ever forget Kylie. She was their first child. She had spent four lucky years with them. They knew that she was going to be with them, no matter what. However, it was time to turn that terrible night of Kylie's accident into the wonderful celebration of Zoe's birthday.

Meredith then had a thought. "Do you think we'll be great grandparents?" she asked Derek.

"Are you kidding? We'll be the best grandparents ever, even better than Mark and Addison," Derek replied.

"Why do you say that?" Meredith asked him a little confused.

"Because we actually live in Seattle," Derek replied as Meredith laughed. "Mark and Addison live all the way over in New York."

"Well, Zoe is an excuse to come back more often," Meredith pointed out.

Derek knew she had a point. "I'm still the best grandpa."

Meredith agreed. She then turned around and they shared a deep passionate kiss. She finally pulled away after a few seconds. "I love you, Grandpa Derek," she said as she gave him a smile.

"I love you too, Grandma Meredith," Derek replied, returning her smile.

"Derek, I want you to promise me something," Meredith said suddenly. "I know we have discussed this before. But I want to bring it up again." Derek was ready to listen. He was a little worried about what she would say. "If something happens to me first, I don't want you to be miserable and alone again. I want you to find love again."

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," Derek gently replied. "Don't worry. Whatever will happen, we get through it together."

Meredith nodded. "Promise?"

"I promise," Derek told her. Meredith could tell that he meant it. She didn't know what the future held for them as new grandparents. But she knew that it was going to be a fun ride with Derek by her side.


End file.
